GMT

Today in History: November 17

1558 Queen Elizabeth ascends to the throne of England.

1800 The Sixth Congress (2nd session) convenes for the first time in Washington, D.C.

1869 The Suez Canal is formally opened.

1903 Vladimir Lenin's efforts to impose his own radical views on the Russian Social Democratic Labor Party splits the party into two factions, the Bolsheviks, who support Lenin, and the Mensheviks.

1913 The first ship sails through the Panama Canal, which connects the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.

1918 Influenza deaths reported in the United States have far exceeded World War I casualties.

1931 Charles Lindbergh inaugurates Pan Am service from Cuba to South America in the Sikorsky flying boat American Clipper.

1965 The NVA ambushes American troops of the 7th Cavalry at Landing Zone Albany in the Ia Drang Valley, almost wiping them out.

1967 The American Surveyor 6 makes a six-second flight on the moon, the first liftoff on the lunar surface.

1993 US House of Representatives passes resolution to establish the North American Free Trade Agreement.


Born on November 17

1925 Rock Hudson, actor (McMillan & Wife TV series; Giant).

1938 Gordon Lightfoot, Canadian singer, songwriter, musician ("Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald," "In the Early Morning Rain").


1944 Danny DeVito, actor, director, producer (Taxi TV series; Throw Momma from the Train, Pulp Fiction).

JOTD
A man heard that masturbating before sex often helped blokes last longer during the act. The man decided to give it a try. He spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it. He couldn't do it in his office, but that was too open. He considered an alley, but figured that was too unsafe.
On his way home, he pulled his truck over on the side of the highway. He got out and crawled underneath as if he was examining the truck.
Satisfied with the privacy, he undid his pants and started to wank. He closed his eyes and thought of his lover. As he grew closer to the big finish, he felt a quick tug at the bottom of his pants.
Not wanting to lose his mental fantasy or the orgasm, he kept his eyes shut and replied, "What?"
He heard, "This is the police. What's going on down there?"
The man replied, "I'm checking out the rear axle, it's busted."
Came the reply, "Well, you might as well check your brakes too while you're down there because your truck rolled down the hill 5 minutes ago."