re: Caught my kid drinking

I just had a lot of things going on where I didn't need alcohol to have fun or be someone else for a little while.

I was who I was.

Yeah. I'm sure I'd handle it better than the OP.

I know I was a stand up kid and rare case. I can also forgive.

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I just had a lot of things going on where I didn't need alcohol to have fun or be someone else for a little while.

I was who I was.

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You think people drink to become someone else?

that's weird

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then I tried to collect myself and remember what I did at 15.

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I sure as hell wasn't drinking at 15. But maybe I'm a prude.

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Yes. Yes it is. By definition it is.

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If you were a peer, you'd be hypocritical, but a parent is different. A parent should want the best for their kids, including doing things better than they did when they were younger.

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It doesn't matter anyway. Everyone is in control of their own destiny once they are adults

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Yes, and raising your kids with adult privileges and teaching responsibility, hard work, and speaking to them as if they were an adult at an early age will net a more mature, world ready person at an early age than the parent that babies their child, coddles their child, and is super strict on them. You can tell how fast someones kid will mature if the momma fixes their dinner plate for them and serves them or allows them to fix their own plate. Look around next time your with friends/family and see if Im wrong about that. Look at the maturity of the children and if they are being served food or if they are being trusted to serve themselves. Food is sort of an analogy, apply that to various walks.

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If you make him hide it, you'll cause even more problems.

Teach him responsibility, not fear. It's a privilege that is earned.

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this, they hide it and it could turn to a bad problem. You teach responsibility and he will be much better off

It is not by definition. You decide to raise your kid differently and not tolerate something for the better of the child is not hypocritical.

You could take this scenario to more drastic acts and consequences and your reasoning falls apart.

Why not just have an honest talk about it? If your child thinks they are an adult, talk to them about it like one, but let them know you are still boss. Usually parents will not get a lot of backlash when they do that and they will respect yet fear you for it. Thats what my dad did. His rules about it were...

1. I'm not buying it for you, nor will I give you money for it. I had to figure out how to get it in my day, so good luck and learn Spanish haha

2. Don't you dare drive anywhere after even a sip of alcohol or I will kill you. (Most stern look I have ever received from my dad)

3. If you get caught with it by another adult or cop, I will let the legal system takes its course and I will not shield you. An MPI means a fine and community service. If you get arrested for it, I will let you sit in jail for a full 24 hours to let you process what you did. Be prepared to be a man and accept a mans responsibility if you want to act like one.

3. Don't be drinking directly in my house, unless I give you permission for a rare family or social event. If I find any alcohol around this house that is not mine, I will pour it out.

4. Again, don't you dare drive ANYWHERE after drinking anything. If you get caught somewhere, call me and I will pick you up. I do not care if its 4 AM when I have work the next morning. You will pay for it later, but I would rather you call me in a bind than drive after drinking.

5. Don't let your mom know about it. She will beat your arse if she finds out, and I will be forced to whip your arse too.

He then said something along the lines of "If you can accept these rules and are not an idiot about it, that is fine. Just know your limits, do not drive after even a sip, do not do it around my house, and good luck with your Hey Misters"


Looking back on it, I was glad to have started drinking back in high school. I learned my limit early, I actually learned most alcohol tastes like shite so it never stuck to me, and when I went to LSU, I did not go overboard my first night out like a bunch of sheltered re-re's do. Just talk to them about it, but set strict guidelines, and let them know they will be punished if they do it irresponsibly or blatanly in your face. I remember mowing the yard hungover as hell one summer morning at 8 AM after getting caught. Just don't go batshit crazy and try to ignore it, because that will almost always yield a negative response.