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Posted on 1/21/16 at 11:56 am to thatguy
Jerk store called.
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:01 pm to tidalmouse
quote:
Jerk store called and they're running out of you
It doesn't matter! You're their number one seller!
This post was edited on 1/21/16 at 12:03 pm
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:02 pm to thatguy
"your thread sucks"
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:04 pm to thatguy
Any of them Jewish or vaguely brown? That makes it a lot easier.
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:08 pm to thatguy
The best one I've ever heard was when a buddy and I were playing Halo. It started off with me saying something stupid about the guy's mom, to which he informed us she was dead. My buddy said, "So that's why she didn't squirm around too much when I ****ed her."
Savage.
Savage.
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:09 pm to thatguy
"Mike likes to eat hotdogs while watching Anderson Cooper. Mike says it's his happy hour."
"Mike's favorite band is Nickleback"
"Mike wears yoga pants. How's your downward facing dog going these days Mike?"
"Mike eats beans before competition. He says the farts work as propulsion"
"Mike sucks"
"Mike's favorite band is Nickleback"
"Mike wears yoga pants. How's your downward facing dog going these days Mike?"
"Mike eats beans before competition. He says the farts work as propulsion"
"Mike sucks"
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:10 pm to thatguy
Yea, this sounds like a great idea, nothing could go wrong here.
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:35 pm to Bucktail1
When someone politely says: "I'm sorry",
I say: "That's OK, looks aren't everything".
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:43 pm to thatguy
Mike is the best player on the team at playing D......playing Deez Nuts! HA! GOT EM! GOT EM!
Mike is a very selfish player, he only cares about Mike. Well that isn't totally true, there is another Mike he has feelings for. Mike Hock.
Mike is a very selfish player, he only cares about Mike. Well that isn't totally true, there is another Mike he has feelings for. Mike Hock.
This post was edited on 1/21/16 at 12:46 pm
Posted on 1/21/16 at 12:46 pm to thatguy
I think you know you have to tread carefully here and not say anything too insulting. Probably your best bet is to google "roast jokes" or "roast one liners"... here's one list of jokes:
LINK
There's two samples of clean jokes from the site I linked which you can easily tweak to fit your venue... but even that can be tricky. If it's just the kids there, you'd be fine cracking those type jokes. If any parents are there, they might be more inclined to be insulted on behalf of their kids.
LINK
quote:
What can you say about a man who is admired, revered, and loved by everyone? I can start by saying he’s not the man we’re honoring tonight.
quote:
He’s afraid nobody will remember him when he’s gone. Gee, I can think of several reasons he’ll be remembered. He wouldn’t like any of them, but I can think of them.
There's two samples of clean jokes from the site I linked which you can easily tweak to fit your venue... but even that can be tricky. If it's just the kids there, you'd be fine cracking those type jokes. If any parents are there, they might be more inclined to be insulted on behalf of their kids.
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