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I watched "you're next" Friday night and I had plenty of the same thoughts you did.




SPOILERS!









Someone shooting crossbows through the window? Well just leave someone upstairs by themselves. Nothing could go wrong right?
The whole splitting up thing just pisses me off.
Dad sure as hell doesn't have a problem sending his only daughter into certain doom through the front door.
And after three people are killed they still refuse to barricade themselves in an upstairs bedroom with makeshift weapons.

Btw, as soon as I found out there were only 3 killers I would have bum rushed them in force one at a time.

don't bother checking the backseat when you jump in a car.... no one would EVER think to hide back there !

while people are being killed around you, now is a great time to take a shower alone.

make sure to get in front of as many windows as possible to give the killer(s) lot's of opportunities.

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don't bother checking the backseat when you jump in a car

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I can somewhat defend this one, half the time they are completely unaware that someone is trying to murder the shite out of them.

I've stopped checking, but probably not any more...dick

Survival Rules:

1. Have at least one black friend for cannon fodder, the more the merrier. Same goes with any couples you know who engage in premarital sex.
2. Hear a strange noise? See something creepy? Run in opposite direction instead of investigating.
3. Don't walk around filming shite, you'll just end up filming your own death.
4. Don't be an a-hole.
5. Now is not the time to fall in love and pursue a romance.
6. If you think something is dead don't go check, continue shooting/stabbing/lighting on fire until the only thing remaining is just a messy pool on the floor.
7. Headshot everything, multiple times. I don't care if Michael Myers or Jason is invincible, let's see them track you down when they have bullet holes where their eyes used to be.
8. Never run upstairs!
9. If you think you're successfully hidden from something, chances are you're not.
10. If something has been chasing you and them seemingly disappears, rest assured it's actually in the location you were trying to get to (indoors, car, etc.) It WILL be there waiting for you. Just avoid that and go somewhere else.
11. The first person to suggest splitting up: knock them unconscious and leave them as a treat for the killer to waste time on while the rest of the group goes ANYWHERE else as long as it's together.

I'm sure there are more, but they would vary based on what the killer is (man, monster, ghost, demon, whatever).

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Headshot everything, multiple times

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I disagree, unload like you typically would, then walk up with them on the ground and deliver the kill shot.

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10. If something has been chasing you and them seemingly disappears, rest assured it's actually in the location you were trying to get to (indoors, car, etc.) It WILL be there waiting for you. Just avoid that and go somewhere else.

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One of my favorite Robot Chicken scenes is about this.

Jason's Deceiving Speed

I didn't say I put my foot on his chest and shoot him in the head...

I'm not stupid, these people are typically chicks or beta males who have never fired a weapon in their life, not only are they not going to make head shots with any kind of consistency, they're not going to hit those at all.

center of mass...short, but ample distance, boom, right in the head

the kill shot is necessary to confirm that the threat or (in a scenario with multiple perps) one of the threats is done (very important, you kill the last one, but wait that other one wasn't really dead)

also, if it is only one thing you're running from, you can then stop running, finish them off and now you don't have to keep running.

when has this ever happened?

twice?

Normal males aren't in these movies, it is always some dipshit in touch with his feelings motherfricker, and if there is a capable male in the movie, he is most likely the killer