re: Moral Puzzle

I was in a very, very similar position 10 years ago. I left company B when I got the offer from company A after a very, very short amount of time. I was just honest with company B and apologized profusely, but I had to do what was right for me. It was certainly uncomfortable, and I wish it hadn't gone down like that, but it did and it was the right decision.

Personally, I'd have reservations about moving to company A, based on what you've said. Sounds like a company with stupid hiring practices. That wouldn't give me the warm and fuzzies.

My last move went like this:

Applied for Company A that a friend works at. Heard nothing for months, not even an email that they received my application/resume.

Applied for Company B that another friend works at. Phone interview with HR at B within 10 days. They provided me the details of the position and scheduled my sit down interview. Did the in person interview within 10 days. Negotiated offer and hired within another 10 days. Throughout this entire process, I was updated by HR every 48 hours.

Then I got a call from company A that they were ready to interview. I politely declined. My friend who is still at A told me they still hadn't hired that position 9 months later.

I write this novel to say: a company with stupid hiring practices is most likely full of other stupid processes. I'd stick with your current job.

I was in a similar position.

I told my "company A" to pound sand. They had their shot and blew it.


I'm very happy with my "company B"

Company A sounds like my company's dumbass HR department. They issue a req and next thing you know the req is pulled, only to be approved again a short time later. That said, once you're in, you're in.

I wouldn't read too much into how A handled the hiring process...the folks making those determinations aren't the folks in your management chain you're going to be working for.

If you really want to work for A and think it will always be in the back of your mind when you have a bad day at B or get frustrated at B, you've got to look out for number 1 and trust your gut. As far as your buddy, if he can't understand and appreciate your quandary and how you want to handle it, frick it. Unless he's getting a referral bonus through your employment at B, he shouldn't put the needs of "his company" above the needs of his friend. Likewise, whomever he put it in a good word to about you should understand that shite happens and that it's not your buddy's fault.