re: Beach-goers in Orange Beach find a million dollars worth of marijuana and cocaine

I'd load that shite up, bring it to a safehouse, and slowly add it to my personal stash. Never sell a gram; personal use only. No one would have any idea, except that I'd be in an overall good mood for the foreseeable future. And, I'd have a little more cash bumping around in my pocket.

Man, frick this country's Puritanical sanctions on anything that causes joy. Who/what would be harmed if I had easy access to a stimulant which I have used for years in moderation without issue?