re: Thinking about buying a 4 runner....need some advice.

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it will also cost more upfront and over the life of the vehicle in gas and maintenance costs.

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Throw insurance in there as well. It's not a huge difference, but 4WD vehicles cost a little more to insure.

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because not a whole lot of people buying 4 runners are looking for 4 runners to take them off-road

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Maybe this is different in different markets, but well maintained 4WD 4Runners are VERY highly sought after in the used market in a lot of areas. They're harder to find than 2WD ones, so just by basic supply and demand you'll have a lot easier time selling a used 4WD one than a 2WD one, and probably net more for the 4WD.

But as you said, if you're not going to use the 4WD, there's not reason to get one.