re: Seen bigfoot?

This is a story about an old drunk in Rayvegas. We'll call him Lenny.


Lenny loved to get smashed to oblivion at the little redneck bar in Rayville. Lenny's wife put up with his shite for years. Finally she had enough and decided to make him toe the line or else. Lenny saw the handwriting on the wall and decided he needed to clean up. So he did. Made it a month or so with no booze and no trips to the bar. Lenny's wife was thrilled. Then one day it rained. Lenny always went to the bar when it rained him out of work. He tried to resist but failed miserably. He was in the bar before noon, and stayed there till it closed. Lenny's drunk as shite buddies were somehow sober enough to know Lenny was too fricked up to drive, so one of them drove him home while the other followed in their car. They got Lenny home, rolled him out and hauled arse. Lenny stumbles up to the door. It' locked. So we stumbles around the house trying windows. At last he finds the bathroom window unlocked, so he raises it and belly flops onto the window sill. Like a lot of bathroom windows, Lenny's bathroom window is raised up off the floor a good bit. So as he gets half his inebriated body into the window he starts reaching down with his hands feeling for the bathroom floor. He can't find it so he inces his way further and further in until bam. Lenny crashes head first into the closed lid of the toilet and crumples to the floor. Lenny's wife hears all the commotion, walks into the bathroom and finds him crumpled up on the floor. She flips the light switch and stares down at him in disgust shaking her head and says "Drunk again". Lenny replied "Yea me too".