re: Crackpot ASOIAF Theories SPOILERS

Now, what will likely be my last recap post in some time to let the theoretical juices flow some more. Here are the theories that appear from pages 274-298:

Either Brienne dies protecting Jaime or they both die together; Maybe UnCat has him resurrected and his right hand is somewhat restored as well somehow...and he kills Cersei (274)
Detailed recap of Euron and Jaqen's dealings (274)
What did Euron's crew see that needed to be kept secret so bad that he cut the tongues off of all his crew? Did Euron have a really nasty salt wife? was it Fight Club? Or was it the dragon egg trade to kill Balon? (274)
Euron hired a faceless man who knocked Balon off a bridge and into the sea...since the trade was a life for the dragon egg; essentially Euron threw the egg into the sea as he said (275)
More Talk of Mance=Ser Arthur Dayne (276 and 279)
Ashara Dayne is still alive and perhaps has/had a role in the R+L=J cover-up (275)
Brandon Stark + Ashara Dayne = Darkstar (275)
After ToJ, Ned arrived at Starfell with Jon. While there, he slept with Ashara while comforting her over the death of Arthur-this would help explain Ned Dayne + the fact that Wylla was both Jon and Ned's milk mother. (276)
Dany's dragons are lightbringer, Drogo was Nissa Nissa, Dany was reborn in the flames under the bleeding star, and she drew from the fire a weapon to be used against the others. Dany is AA (276)
Mance is Dayne but also a faceless man. This would explain why no one in Winterfell recognized such a famous person (277)
Everyone is a faceless man (277)
CarsonRN + BluegrassBelle = Jon Snow (277)
The last person standing will be Hot Pie astride a giant Bread Dragon (277)
Euron's eye patch is hiding a purple eye (278)
Arya wargs into Drogon, destroys King's Landing and Casterly Rock, then eats Dany, then torches the others (280) [she seriously kills everyone in theory]
Hot Pie is R'llhor and Cold Pie is the Great Other (280)
Maybe Jojen is so in touch with his Green Dreams that he can communicate with the dead as well as he can the living-Howland is dead (280)
Howland Reed=Jojen theory (281)
A crannog is an artificial island found in Scotland or Ireland...Greywater Watch is an artificial island (282)
Crannogmen are cajuns (282)
3 Dragons are 3 titles for the same person (Lord Commander, King in the North, King of the Iron Throne) (282)
Jaime = AA (282)
Beric = AA...the end (282)
Varys has king's blood-his junk was used by a red god worshipper (283)
No, some God just wanted some nuts (283)
Why would Tyrion sleep with Shae if he hated whores so much unless Shae was a spy the whole time (284)
Tywin was the hand that had the passageways built to Chatayaya's (284)
The 7 represent the Starks: Ned=Father, Cat=Mother, etc (285)
The 7 represent characters but not just Starks: Jaime=Knight, Brienne=Maiden, Smith=Gendry (285)
Pale Mare=bloody flux, Kraken and dark flame=Victarion and red priest, Lion and Griffin=Tyrion and Connington, Sun's son=Quentyn Martell, Mummer's Dragon=Aegon, and Perfumed Seneschal=Hizdarh zo Loraq (285)
Perfumed Senschal=the boat Salaesari Qhoran (286)
Perfumed Seneschal=Varys (291)
List of Mystical beasts of Westeros (287)
Coldhands was a wight that Bloodraven warged into (288)
R+L=J proven with Ned's thoughts? (288)
Coldhands was a warg who died and warged into an Other/wight (288)
Jeyne's grandma was Maggie the Frog (290)
Jon is Dragonborn! (291)
Varys was born infertile and so he volunteered his junk as a way to keep the Blackfyre name alive somehow (291)
Final Epilogue will feature a current young character as a very old person telling a story to some young children (292)
The old person is Rickon...therefore Rickon=Smith (creates the story) and the 7 really are the Starks (292)
Varys was castrated by a Targ ritual (292)
Varys is a staunch Targ supporter who supports the best ruler for the realm (supported Rhaegar over Aerys and Aegon over Dany) (292)
Varys only told Aerys about Rhaegars plotting to get him to leave the Red Keep for the first time in 5 years and thus confirming to the world his craziness and unfitness to rule. (292)
The complete Blackfyre Theory in detail (292)
Littlefinger will win the Game of Thrones (292)
Hugo thinks one or all the dragons will die (296)
Ash Williams feels that at least one of the dragon's riders will die as well (296)
Maybe a missing Valyrian sword is in the Iron Throne (296)
Obsidian candles=candles in Hocus Pocus. If they are lit, magic shite can happen (297)
The weirwood trees will come alive somehow but hopefully not LOTR style (298)
Everybody hates Mereen/Dany (various pages)