Driving around central Europe, June/July. Need rental car advice...

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Poland

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AAA International Driving permit is required.

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We'll be visiting some family there.

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Cafeteria Topping
• 4 oz diced kielbasa or smoked bacon
• 1 small yellow onion, diced fine
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 serrano pepper, chopped
• 1 heaping tbsp sweet paprika
• 1 tsp hot paprika
• 1 heavy pinch black pepper
• 1.5 cups grated Gouda
(trust me: they used too much)
• 3 tbsp ketchup
yes… three.
• 1 tbsp mayo
non-negotiable if you want authenticity
• (Optional but probable) dash of Tabasco

Instructions
1. Cook the meat
Fry your kielbasa or bacon until it smells like the office HR department would send you home for being too fragrant.
2. Add veggies
Onion, garlic, serrano.
Cook until the onions are soft and the pepper’s heat starts lighting up your sinuses.
3. Spice it like you’re angry
Dump in the paprika. Not a sprinkle. A dump.
If the pan doesn’t momentarily look radioactive, you went too soft.
4. Kill the heat and add the cheese
Mix until it turns into a sticky, stretchy, slightly alarming mixture.
5. Now the part that scares Americans
Add the ketchup.
Add the mayo.
Watch the mixture turn into something your ancestors warn you about in dreams.
This combo is exactly why it tasted so good. The ketchup sweetens the paprika and balances the heat. The mayo makes it creamy instead of rubbery. Cafeteria witchcraft.
6. Toast your bread lightly
Because everything goes downhill from here.
7. Load it up
Spoon the mixture on like you’re burying your problems under cheese.
8. Broil
Just long enough to brown the top and get that molten, borderline-dangerous finish.

How to adjust the recipe when using Spicy Ketchup
This stuff hits stronger in flavor, so do this:
• Use 2 tbsp spicy ketchup, not 3
• Keep the 1 tbsp mayo (it balances the heat and texture)
• Cut the hot paprika from 1 tsp to ½ tsp
Otherwise you’ll turn it into a war crime.

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