re: Anyone ever take down an older home and rebuild

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Any idea what their price range and time frame was for this project?

We’re trying to decide if we want to add a 2nd floor, or start over w a tear down & rebuild

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I've never been one to ask what people spend their money on or how much things cost. I know they weren't in a rush since they stayed in their starter home while the lot was cleared and house built. They are both highly paid professional people so it's safe to assume their combined salaries made it much easier to do this and not have to sell their starter home for capital.

Adding a 2nd floor on an existing house requires a lot of work, both in tearing things out and rebuilding.

Even if a partial 2nd floor over 1/2 the existing house, the roof will need to be opened and that area totally removed, all existing ceiling joists will need to be replaced with larger dimensional lumber to handle the heavier load of the 2nd floor, lots of new wiring, plumbing, A/C and heat need to be put in place, you'll lose floor space on the 1st floor so the stairs can be put in place, and if trying to do this while still living in the house is VERY inconvenient.

If I were thinking about this, I'd opt to buy something existing or build new to fit your needs.