re: My Mom has been getting worse with her dementia

I feel ya brother. We are dealing with the same thing with my mom. Not much advice I can give.

She was diagnosed with Parkinson's and moved in with us (I'm an only child, and she was widowed when I was 18) about 7 years ago. The first few years weren't too bad, but in 2022 she fell and broke her knee cap, then had an aortic valve replaced in 2023. Two days after this past Christmas she was in the hospital for a week with a UTI that went septic and pneumonia, and then was back in the hospital last week with another UTI and anemia. Like your mom, she doesn't want to bathe, forgets to change her Depends (even when we tell her and lay them out for her), rarely washes her hands and never brushes her teeth.

We have a 2 year old and a 2 month old who has spina bifida. With the two kids and both of us working (even though I work from home) it is getting to be too much for us to handle. I took her to her PCP today for a hospital follow-up, and she is doing a referral to palliative care - longer term then hospice, but insurance/medicare should pay for some of it. Our other choice is assisted living, but that would be close to $4,000/month out of pocket after her monthly social security.