I've been following along in this thread... I am sorry for what you and he just went through. It is ok to feel a sense of relief. Someone you loved was suffering, and relief that he is not suffering anymore is normal and natural.

I hope I am lucky enough for someone to be with me when it is my time the way you were with him.

I went through all of this with my father in law a few years back, and others before him, and there will be more after. It is truly remarkable how much the human body and brain can take.

After his death, my appreciation of the song Black Peter really changed. It's always been about death, and about the roller coaster you've been on:

All of my friends come to see me last night
I was laying in my bed and dying
Annie Bonneau from St. Angel
Say the weather down here so fine

Just then the wind came squalling through the dark
But who can the weather command?
Just wanna have a little peace to die
And a friend or two I love at hand

Fever roll up to a hundred and five
Roll on up, gonna roll back down
One more day I find myself alive
Tomorrow maybe go beneath the ground

See here how everything lead up to this day
And it's just like any other day that's ever been
Sun going up and then the sun going down
Shine through my window and my friends they come around
Come around, come around

The people might know but the people don't care
That a man could be as poor as me
Take a look at poor Peter, he's lying in pain
Now let's go run and see, run and see
Run and see, run, run and see and see

It's that second to last verse man - it is the most significant and important day ever in the life of the dying and his/her loved ones. But the reality is it's just another day. the world just keeps rolling on. Hits me real fricking hard these days.

Anyway, wrap yourself in good memories and the knowledge that you did what was right by him and had the honor of being there when he moved on to wherever...