Rethinking my whole Winn Parish compound idea

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Obese city people

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Tyler Durden said they are good for making soap.

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find a Sam's Club somewhere and when Armageddon comes take it over with an armed group.

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Walmart would be a good choice too. Not as many useful tools, but they do have guns and skylights.

On further thought the best place is the limestone tunnels they have outside Kansas City. Grocery chains store an incredible amount of food in those manmade caves because it is cool and dry. The government stores a lot of food there too (lots of cheese). It is perfect because:

Food forever.
Extremely easy to defend.
Dry.
Cool in summer.
Warm in winter.

With all the food in your control you could quickly build an army of loyal serfs who farm the rich river soil outside. The river would also be a handy transportation system for trade (vitamin D tablets mostly) with neighboring fiefdoms.

The only downside is that the midwest is extremely boring but raids from your neighbors would help with that.

You should also be careful to pick a place with a minimum of natural disasters. Kansas City would be safe from hurricanes obviously, and I'm pretty sure it's far enough away from tornado alley so that's not a huge concern. You'd have to deal with river flooding, but that's easy enough to predict and prepare for. I do think it's on a fault line though.

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Kansas City would be safe from hurricanes obviously, and I'm pretty sure it's far enough away from tornado alley

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No, KC is in tornado alley but the headquarters would be in a cave. Serfs will be lost occasionally but they are easily replaced.

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You'd have to deal with river flooding, but that's easy enough to predict and prepare for. I do think it's on a fault line though.

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The caves are constructed well above potential floods but the fields could be affected so they would have to be located carefully. Crops are really not a big deal with a nearly infinite supply of canned corn and spam but it would be nice to have fresh veggies (maybe Endive) and maybe herds of (mini)cattle.

KC is not on a fault line, the New Madrid fault is on the other side of the state.

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Your reaction time with an armed group will probably be too slow to get there before the individual looters assemble into an overwhelming mob. You are better off identifying wholesale distribution warehouses and assaulting them in an orderly fashion. There will be food and other supplies on ready to transport pallets together with the necessary handling and transportation equipment. Take all that you can to your well defended compound, and use the surplus for bartering with other survivors

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This would have to be planned out well in advance with an armed group ready to roll at a moment's notice. Distribution warehouses would be easier but there is a massive difference in the amount of food stored in the caves versus what could be hauled out of warehouses in trucks. Once taken the caves are perfect for defense and will set you up to feed a large group for life if you don't forget a can opener. No need to rely on transporting it through maurading gangs (see Mad Max).

I think you would draw the attention of the Army units stationed at Ft. Riley if you were to try and commandeer the food supplies outside Kansas City.

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Ah well. This is where my plan falls to the ground. There's no possible way of answering that argument, I'm afraid.

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I think offering food to the army so they will become your private army might work.

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Great concession speech there Mr. Norman Voles.

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It's always been one of my favorite Python bits. Great pick up, that's fairly obscure.

You should invite cash and his army of mexican whores and mini-cows to be one of your serfs... that would help you keep the soldiers happy...