Samson

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He needs to get a job

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he has a job at a health club

Just got off the phone w/ him. I asked him what his primary motive is, and he basically told me that he doesn't want any kids and is looking for a way to avoid paying child support. He asked about the military because he was hoping that they'd cover the child support. His biggest concern is that once his grandparents find out about it, they are going to cut him off financially because an unplanned pregnancy isn't part of their "plan" for him. I told him that if that's the route he wants to take, I can't help him anymore.

I'm not a beer drinker... is there any faint taste of Steen's?

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Your step-son )and you) sound like a piece of work. The point to decide if you want to be part of a kids life is BEFORE you have sex, not after.

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as stated prior, I have nothing to do w/ it. My responsibility was to take care of him and to help raise him when his real father didn't step up to the plate. I've fulfilled by responsibilities. He's a grown man now and needs to make his own decisions and learn from his mistakes. All I can do is provide advice/suggestions, which is what I've done.

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Adoption? Probably not likely if she already has a child. Does she work and could she keep her job having to take care of 3 children?

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I think she's also in school. She's more than happy and has no shame getting government assistance, WIC, etc. To make things even trashier (if that's possible), the father of her first child is incarcerated.

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Yet he chose to go live with him?

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his dad's parents are the ones with all the $. They pay for his school, apartment, etc.

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It's no wonder he is the way he is. I realize he's not your biological son, but FFS "being a part of his own kids' lives" really shouldn't be viewed as a decision.

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I'm just going by what he told me. I can't force him to do what's right; I can only offer advice. Heck, 90% of the kids I teach come from single-parent families with no father figure.

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She needs to take a paternity test. If the kids are his, he needs to man up and support them. I wouldn't advise him to marry the girl just to save face. He can still help raise & support them and not be married to her.

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My thoughts 100%

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Sounds like whoever raised him did a pretty shitty job if he's trying to get out of taking responsibility for nutting in some chick.

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Ironically, his dad did the same thing to him. Left my wife (never married her) and just paid child support. Saw him maybe once or twice a year when he came to Louisiana to visit his own parents. His real dad sucks.

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99% chance your stepson wasn't the only guy she was frick buddies with.

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well like I said, she views their relationship as much more serious than he does. He tells her he loves her though so he really has nobody to blame but himself for the hole he's dug for himself.