re: Married OTers...how many times a week/month do you have sex?

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i once told my wife "take that you whore bitch" after i stuck my thumb up her balloon knot...talk about killing the mood.

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Married 27 years. Average between 1 to 2 times a week. Some weeks are great, some stink. Nothing odd about that.

Advice:

1. You can't change her, you can only change you.

2. Google "Athol Kay". Get his Mindful Attraction Plan book.

3. Follow the advice and do a real triage of your situation. Be brutally honest with yourself, because that's the only way you will do what you have to. He also has a forum on his website that helps with the triage.

4. Find those things that made you attractive to her and her attractive to you when you were dating. Figure out how to get them back in your life, even if only in small doses because of the kiddos.

5. STFU about how often you get laid. Don't, under any circumstances, let her know you are tracking until you have made yourself better. You have to improve your sex rank to make her more attracted. Letting her know you are tracking before you are in a position where you can win an ultimatum about it is doomed to failure. Like, divorce-and-never-see-the-kids-you-are-paying-for-level failure. Think of it this way: if you aren't prepared to go back on the market, you aren't ready to make her choose whether to leave you or not.

6. Learn to read her body language and actions, not her words. "Five Love Languages" can help you with that.

7. Become the captain of your ship, and allow her to be a great first officer.

Good luck.

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