re: How do you feel about spanking children?

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I'd ever go so far to say that never spanking your child is pretty close to neglect.

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oh please.

i was never spanked and my parents only raised their voice at me a handful of times and i was more well behaved than 95% of kids.

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oh please.

i was never spanked and my parents only raised their voice at me a handful of times and i was more well behaved than 95% of kids.

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thats subjective...

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Haha, you're cool, bro.

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Buddy Garrity

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i don't think you know TheDoc as well as I do. he tends not to have any gray area.

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i was never spanked and my parents only raised their voice at me a handful of times and i was more well behaved than 95% of kids

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the 5% above you received spankings.

I'm in favor.

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i don't think you know TheDoc as well as I do. he tends not to have any gray area.

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Unfortunately spanking parents are more likely to spank when angry, stressed about work, bills, relationships all things that have nothing to do with their child or that child’s behavior, more likely to spank for accidents incurred during play, split food or drink.

Spanking quickly becomes the first form of discipline not the last, commonly the only one used; spankers can be characterized as control freaks who have no idea how to pick their battles, no concept of age appropriate behavior or expectation, no critical thinking skills in the area of parenting, no creative problem solving skills either on the subject.

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Spanking quickly becomes the first form of discipline not the last, commonly the only one used; spankers can be characterized as control freaks who have no idea how to pick their battles, no concept of age appropriate behavior or expectation, no critical thinking skills in the area of parenting, no creative problem solving skills either on the subject.

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Am I supposed to take your word on this, or has there been extensive research?

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has there been extensive research

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lots and lots of research

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A recent study sponsored by the American Academy of Pediatrics claims that “children who are spanked by their parents are at greater risk for later problems.” The study asserts that children who are spanked score lower on vocabulary tests and are more likely to be aggressive and break rules at school. The glaring weakness in the research – and in its reporting in the popular media – is that its definition of “spanking” is wide enough to drive a truck through.

Those who hold to spanking as a form of biblical discipline are well acquainted with this problem. The word has a semantic range as large as the national debt. It’s commonly used to refer to any form of physical discipline – whether the one administering it is a loving and godly parent or an alcoholic rage-monster, and whether the tool used is a hand, a wooden spoon, or a fraternity paddle. So as we assess the merits of a study like this one, we must be careful to define terms. And because the study’s authors failed to do that, their conclusions are spurious.

The biblical form of discipline advocated by many Christian parents is categorically different from what many people envision when they hear the word “spanking.” To many, the term connotes an angry parent who’s “had it up to here” with some unruly kids. She’s exhausted her regimen of I’m-counting-to-three and go-to-your-room and if-you-don’t-obey-right-now-you’ll-regret-it. In exasperation or maybe even violent aggression, she grabs her child, throws him over her knee, and administers a lashing to his backside, resulting in loud wails and a momentary reprieve from rebellion before the cycle begins again. And this is the more serene version. In extreme cases, the word “spanking” is co-opted by parents who are downright physically abusive and want a culturally acceptable term under which to hide their wicked behavior.

Will children who are spanked in this way grow up to be a) more aggressive and b) less verbal? You bet they will. Does the Christian version of spanking – biblical discipline – bear any resemblance to this picture? Hardly. To be sure, it does involve a parent using physical means to discipline and train a child. But in motive, in method, in means, and in outcome, it is something else entirely.

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I don't get the argument "I was spanked and I'm okay so what's wrong with it?"

It's wrong because it's big people hitting little people, and it's confusing for children to be told to behave while getting smacked.

It's also hypocritical and self-indulgent.

The other popular defense, that spanking is okay because it is effective, is simply false.

If it's so effective, how come parents have to do it again and again?

Once should be enough right?

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Is there a reason this was addressed to me?