re: Has the death of someone close ever changed you?

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Dad, included. It's tough. I just try to stay as strong as I can for my Mom to help give her comfort. I take her pain, and mine

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This so much!!

Lost my dad to a brain hemorrhage 2 years ago. Got the call at 6am in a dead sleep. I freak out every time the phone rings when I'm asleep now. Anyway hardest part is dealing with my mom. She tries to stay strong and not "burden" me as she says, but I know its hard on her. I'm the oldest son so now every conversation/decision she would of had with him she has with me. It sounds weird but its like having 2 wives except one is your grieving mom. Its hard cause there is just certain things she cant do that she needed him (now me) to do. Telling her I cant do it cause I need to take care of my wife and kids make me feel like shite. Doing her stuff and not doing stuff with my wife and kids makes me feel like shite. But in the end the loss makes me want to do more with my kids. I see life differently now, I started going to the doctor and trying to take care of myself and we definitely go on more vacations now Been to Disney 3 times with the kids in the last 2 years as opposed to 0 before.

Basically I insured the hell out of myself with life insurance and am spending more disposable income on family experiences rather than putting it away for a retirement. I'm still saving, but not as much, enjoying the now, ill handle the future when I get there.

Finally, going to church for me is different. I want to go. I still believe in God. But I don't really pay attention to the mass anymore. Most of the time I just sit there and think of dad and wonder why God took him instead of some low life piece of shite.

Yeah it changes you, it makes you a worse person and a better person at the same time. I just try to be the better version more often than the worse version.

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Any success stories?

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i dont know if you'd call it "success", but i had a close friend in high school get killed by a drunk driver. i swore on my life id walk if i had to but i would never drink and drive. not even 1 beer.