re: For OT men, do you hold emotions?

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If you show too much emotion, both men and women will think you're weak.

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Sounds like a good way to know who to avoid.

I cry in movie theaters. I cry when I feel sad. I cry when I need to cry. It feels good.

My best friend told me the other day that he wants to cry so bad "but he doesn't want to seem like a bitch". I just felt bad for him. It's been so ingrained into him that a normal human emotion is reserved for women and weak men that he's suppressed his ability to do so.

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Only person you need to impress is yourself. If your standards are high enough, nothing else is necessary

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I used to fall to pieces having arguments with my wife and stuff, but it never did anything - there was never an aha moment for us where we bonded over shared feelings or saw each other in a new light the way I hoped we would. All it ever did was make things more confusing, more on edge, lead to more misunderstandings. So I made a conscious effort to stop being responsible for that.

Work is the area I struggle the most - combo of lots of righteous anger, a complete inability to affect change, being completely fricking miserable there, working with a bunch of emotional peers that are constantly blowing up about things. I'll be cool and detached for 2 months at a time, then nothing but poison for 2 weeks straight.