re: Bring Us Your Favorite 2021 and Beyond Memes

A few knee slappers.

1) This soldier, Titius, liked to kick a soccer ball around at night and was suspected of breaking some important statues. When his friends asked why he hadn’t show up for his platoon’s morning workout, Terentius Vespa quipped,

“Oh, it’s okay — he said he broke an arm.”


2) [A.] In your view, what kind of man gets caught in flagrante delicto?

[B.] A slow one!


3) A very short witness at a trial comes up to the stand. “Mind if I ask you something?” says Philippus. “Keep it short,” snaps the judge. “No problem,” he replies,

“I just have a tiny bit to ask.”


4) In the finale of a speech, a man thought he’d moved his audience to pity. Once he sat down, he asked Catulus, “Do you think I moved them to pity?” “Oh hell yeah,” replied Catulus,

“I don’t think anyone’s so hard-hearted that they didn’t find your speech pitiful.” (Cicero)