re: A joke to start the day

Coonass Pierre goes the a lawyer to get himself a divorce.

Lawyer: I see you're wanting a divorce Pierre, do you have any grounds?

Pierre: Grounds? Yea I got some grounds. I got Farty acres down sout of Ville Platte.

Lawyer: No, no Pierre, do you have a case?

Pierre: Case? Nah I aint got no Case but I gots a John Deere. That's what I work them grounds wit me.

Lawyer: No Pierre that's not what I mean. Do you have a grudge?

Pierre: Yes I gots a grudge. That's what I park that John Deere under.


Lawyer: No Pierre, listen. You have to have a reason to file for divorce. Is there something your wife has done to you? Is she a mean to you? Is she a nagger?


Pierre: Nagger? Nah lawyer she aint no nagger. But she had that little nagger baby and dats why come I want this divorce.

A dog lover, whose female dog came "in heat," was concerned about keeping it and her male separated. But she had a large house and she believed that she could keep the two dogs apart.

However, as she was drifting off to sleep, she heard awful howling and moaning sounds. She rushed downstairs and found the dogs locked together and unable to disengage, as frequently happens when dogs mate.

Unable to separate them, and perplexed as to what to do next, although it was very late at night, she called her vet, who answered in a very grumpy voice.

After she explained the problem to him, the vet said, "Hang up the phone and place it down alongside the dogs.

I will then call you back and the noise of the ringing will make the male lose his erection and he will be able to withdraw."

"Do you think that will work?" she asked.

"Just worked for me." he replied.

Q: What did the letter O tell the letter Q?

A: Dude, your dicks hanging out!

You know what 90 year old pussy taste like?


Depends...

Screw you for getting Lucas P banned!