re: Fast 9 Discussion Thread

Saw it last night.

I mean. . .

That was one of the worst pieces of shite I have seen in the theater.

The acting, dialogue, CG, and especially the fricktarded plot were all embarrassingly bad.

Cinematography was solid, though. Soundtrack was just ok.

Only Monkeybone was worse, as far as films I paid to see.

fricking space car.

Apparently they will split the story into a part 10 and 11. At least that’s what’s been posted online. Thought 10 would’ve been it.

Hell they might not ever end

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This was one of the worst movies I've ever seen ?

I went in expecting it to be bad but after a while idk it wasn't even funny bad. It was jumping the shark bad.

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It's an utter piece of shite.

I went back and watched Fast Five this weekend just for old times sake. And, as much as I thought that movie was a big action spectacular, its not even in the same stratosphere of ridiculousness as F9.

These movies really need to scale it down for F10, but I honestly dont know how they can at this point. I mean, it's such a Roger Moore-level Bond shite show parody at this piont, going back to even a semi-realistic heist/car culture film would feel like it's from another franchise now.

Fast Five doesn't even resemble anything close to what I just saw in F9.... And that's an incredible feat, and not in a good way.

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y tigahland

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Sir,
I’d like to apologize for telling you to stop complaining about the over the top stuff.

Saw this movie tonight. Easily the worst of all the fast and furious movies, and just one ridiculous scene after another.

Again I’m sorry for trying to take up for this movie. It is nothing like all of the previous ones.

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A lot of get off my lawn in this thread

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This.


Look, the action pieces have been getting more cartoonish for years, and while that isn’t what draws me to the franchise, it doesn’t really bother me seeing what kind of crazy shite they come up with.

The family are all pretty much Ethan Hunt at this point, and I love the MI series so why can’t I enjoy this for doing similarly outrageous stunts/heists/chase scenes??

Ultimately, I like the characters and how they interact, and they generally do a solid job of setting up the scenarios that bring them all together to take down some big bad.

All in all, the action is fun, although I hate that they are going more and more CGI, and I actually REALLY enjoyed the flashbacks. Getting more of the backstory on Dom and his father was great imo, and honestly I wanted to see even more (do we know much at all about the mom??)

They did a good job of introducing a new brother and setting up the feud between them. I really wish they had left Mia out of it though. I just find it so unrealistic that Brian is sitting at home with the kids while she’s out risking her life like she was. It’s kind of insulting to the legacy of his character. (Speaking of, I’ve said this before but Dom naming his son Brian is SOOOOO dumb. Brian is alive, dudes don’t name their sons after their friends that they see all the time. That’s weird He should have named him Paul. The audience would understand the tribute and it’s a way of having Paul Walker live on, because again, Brian the character isn’t dead )



Anyway, they could have just had Dom bring his son to her to watch him while he’s gone if they wanted to include a role for Brewster (where was his son actually?? ), and then give her another couple of scenes over the phone when she learns that Cena is involved and one at the end for her to convince Dom to give him another chance. She adds nothing by being in the cars imo.


HAN GOAT.

Nobody isn’t dead is he??

All the talk about the space car, I actually thought that whole scene was pretty fun. Tyrese’s whole theory about them being invincible was a perfect nod to the over the topness of the series, and Luda’s “it’s simple physics” gave it a nice grounding to the silliness of it (why can’t a shuttle be shaped like a Fiero?? It wasn’t like they took one directly off a used car lot and strapped a rocket to it. They had been working on it for a long time and had obviousiy reinforced it with the same aluminum alloys and thermal glass the actual shuttles use, so who cares if Bow Wow and Black decided to use a design like that —holy shite those two aged terribly btw and when did Black learn to fly stealth bombers, according to the new timeline he was getting kicked out of HS and moved to Tokyo like three years ago )


Anyway, Dom somehow hooking his car onto a bridge cable and slingshotting over a canyon or controlling that RV’s flip to use it to swat that plane out of the sky was way more cringeworthy than the space scene imo.

Btw, Tej’s reaction when they made it to orbit was actually pretty awesome. That jokester being overwhelmed by the beauty and magnitude of the moment was pretty great imo.


Cena was pretty good (the younger version of him was a perfect cast too, Dom’s as well), but Rock and Statham were missed (end credits scene was good stuff) and Theron is really pretty lame as the villain. Hopefully they bring in a better big bad for the final installment.


Overall enjoyable enough. The flashbacks are up there with some of the better character developing scenes of the series, but I do still put this in the bottom tier with 2 and 8.

5 and 1 still the best with 7 and 6 right below based solely on the Walker and Gadot factor, with 4 and 3 falling in the middle.

Hoping 10 gets back to the higher level of the series

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We're sitting in Row F. Seats 9 & 10. Because how could we NOT?

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And above all, you’re family.