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# Best Aggie Jokes

Posted on 1/5/11 at 8:56 am
Posted on 1/5/11 at 8:56 am
Some lame, some useful--
Posted on 1/5/11 at 9:07 am
quote:

Did you hear about the Aggie terrorist who tried to blow up the Longhorn team bus.
He burned his lip on the tailpipe.

quote:

How can you tell an Aggie is on location at a drilling rig?
He's the one throwing bread to the helicopters.
This post was edited on 1/5/11 at 9:09 am
Posted on 1/5/11 at 9:20 am to
quote:

An Aggie went in to see his advisor, who said, "I want you to take history, math, and logic." "What's logic?" asked the Aggie. "Well," said the professor, "I'll give you an example. Do you own a Weed-eater?" "Why, yes, I do," replied the Aggie. "OK," continued the professor, "logic tells me that you have a yard!" "Amazing," gushed the young rube. "And," continued the professor, "since you have a yard, logic tells me that you have a house." "I do! I do!" exclaimed the boy. "And," continued the professor, "if you have a house, you probably have a wife. And, since you have a wife, I conclude that you are a heterosexual." "Gaaaa-lee!" said the Aggie. "That logic is sump'n else!"
He goes outside, and his friend, Buck, asks him what classes he's going to take. "I'm gonna take history, math, and logic." "What's logic?" asks Buck. "OK," says the Aggie, "I'll give you an example: Do you own a weed-eater?" "Uh, no," relies Buck.

The Aggie pauses a bit and says, "You're QUEER, ain'tcha".

Dont know why, but I 'd
Posted on 1/5/11 at 9:29 am
One not on list:

How many Aggies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four---one to hold the light bulb, and 3 to turn the ladder.

Posted on 1/5/11 at 9:36 am
There are only two aggie jokes; the rest are truths.
Posted on 1/5/11 at 9:49 am
My favorite: Aggie walks into a doctor's office with a toad sitting on his head. The doctor asks "what seems to be the problem?" The toad replies "Can you burn this wart off of my arse?"
Posted on 1/5/11 at 10:05 am
my 1st was, the the Aggie that drowned when the pickup he was riding in crashed into a river...because he could not get the tail gate down.

favorite: how do you get an Aggie off your front porch? pay him for the pizza. (Ole miss can be substitured)
Posted on 1/5/11 at 10:07 am
quote:

"Can you burn this wart off of my arse?"

Posted on 1/5/11 at 10:15 am
Texas A&M Assistant Head Coach Tim DeRuyter came to the Aggies from the Air Force Academy. When asked what he missed most about the Air Force Academy when compared to A&M, he replied, "The pretty girls.".
Posted on 1/5/11 at 10:43 am

One of my favorites (I'll shorten the list)

Routes used by different groups to evacuate Houston

when a Cat 5 hurricane takes strait aim:

1)Longhorns & other real Texans US HWY 290W
2)LSU Tigers & other Cajuns I 10E
3)Sooners & Yankees I 45N
4)Tam Aggies I 610 loop !

The imagery of this happening makes me lol every time I think of it.
Posted on 1/5/11 at 11:12 am
Original and funny
Posted on 1/5/11 at 12:04 pm

quote:

Have you heard about the Aggie kamikaze pilot?
He flew 22 missions.

Posted on 1/5/11 at 12:36 pm
Did you hear about the Aggie who locked the keys in his car? He had to hire a locksmith to get his family out.
This post was edited on 1/5/11 at 12:44 pm
Posted on 1/5/11 at 12:41 pm to
My boss is an aggie and he's always telling aggie jokes. What the hell is wrong with these people?
Posted on 1/5/11 at 12:55 pm to
"Hey look kids, there's Big Ben, and there's Parliament."

Posted on 1/5/11 at 12:59 pm
Best aggie joke:

Their football team.
Posted on 1/5/11 at 1:07 pm to

Posted on 1/5/11 at 1:32 pm
Here is my personel favortie

Ole Clim and is girlfriend were making out in his pick up truck on Texas A&M's campus where they were both grad students. Clim's girlfriend screamed out in the heat of passion "OH CLIM!! KISS ME WHERE IT STINKS!" so ole Clim cranked up the truck and drove on down to Pasadena.

Posted on 1/5/11 at 1:38 pm
This aggie's girlfriend finally agreed to go all the way. Lacking any sexual experiences with human females, he was a little nervous when she demanded that he first go to the pharmacy to get some condoms.

The aggie went up to the counter and asked the pharmacist, " How much for box of them rubbers?"

The pharmacist replied, "Ten dollars" and the aggie proceeded to put a ten dollar bill on the counter.

Then the phamacist said, "No, that will be ten and eighty cents total."

The aggie replied, "But you said it was ten dollars!! What's the extra eighty cents for?"

"Tax", said the pharmacist.

At first the aggie looked confused, but then smiled and said, "Oh I get it now!! You know I always wondered how those things stayed on!!"

Posted on 1/5/11 at 1:43 pm to
quote:

There are only two aggie jokes; the rest are truths

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