re: Who is the best Divorce lawyer in Lafayette?

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Anyway, she took my dog and I'm willing to drop whatever amount of money it takes to skullfrick her legally

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That will change quickly. You are just in the anger phase of grief right now. Give it time. The good ones are going to cost $500 just for an initial consultation and likely a $10,000 initial fee. That will make it through preliminary motion practice if you are serious about your strategy. Then the bills start coming in as preparations for trial starts and people’s financial pain tolerance begins to weaken and your hatred for her is not quite as worth it as you thought. Many end up taking a deal you could have gotten a lot cheaper because you cannot stomach the legal fees and investigator fees and accountant/forensic economist fees if there real money involved. This is when many will transition to the bargaining phase and eventually the acceptance phase.

Good luck. It’s not going to be easy, but can be fun if your goal is as you stated above. I hope you ride it out as nobody deserves what you’ve described. If she’s do that to you she was doing you a favor because she would have made your life miserable the longer she stayed.