re: Fresno police arrested waffle shop patron

Judge: The court finds the Defendant guilty of one count of obstruction of waffle justice. As the sentence for this crime, the state will lay the Defendant down on the court house steps with shirt removed, place a tennis racket over the Defendant’s bare chest, and dispense one bottle of maple syrup into the strings of the racket, thereby humiliating the Defendant with the awfullest of waffles.