re: I'm in law enforcement and I stereotype people all day

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What’s the safe % to skim from cash seizures without anyone saying anything?

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Sadly, it's probably easier than it should be. I would never- and have never- done such a thing but warrant services are messy. Cash piles are everywhere. Money is stuffed in closets, under beds, in safes, buried in the back yard, you name it. A few stacks of 50s here, a few lose 100s there. We try to keep two person accountability in each room but that's not always feasible. I don't think someone's going to have an easy time walking out of a seizure scene with 500k or anything but stuffing a few grand into a cargo pockets? Probably could happen pretty easily.

NOTE: I have never seen it done or even heard anyone discuss this being done. The last place an agent wants to end up in in prison. That doesn't seem to work out well for us.