re: The wife getting over-weight

Easy fix. While taking pictures of something else, on her phone, make sure to get a good shot of her fat arse in the frame. Don't say anything. She will look through her photos and notice. Next thing you know, you'll show up from work one day and she will have gone and spent $500 on salad shite from whole foods, guaranteed.

If she doesn't do that, she's content with being heavy. Then you have to make some decisions.