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re: Your biggest cooking fail?
Posted on 4/7/13 at 3:30 pm to AlxTgr
Posted on 4/7/13 at 3:30 pm to AlxTgr
I think it would be amusing to tell you about Lucy's attempts at cooking.
18 years ago while we were dating...
She decided she wanted fried bacon. She knew what 'fry' meant. Pot full of oil. Turn heat up to high. She knew what bacon meant. Open pack of raw bacon, throw it into hot oil. There was an explosion of sorts.
16 years ago during 1st year of marriage...
She wanted to impress me by actually cooking a meal while I was in night class. She looked up a recipe for Salmon. Went to the grocery and bought ingredients. When I got home she served it. It was green. I took a bite and said "I'm sorry, dear, I can't eat this." She tried a bite and said "That's OK, I can't eat it either."
We put our plates on the floor for the black lab (who will eat anything). The dog sniffed it and walked away.
12 years ago... After 4 years of not trying her hand at cooking she said that she volunteered to make brownies for the Xmas party at work. They came out smelling and tasting like brownies. But they were the size and consistency of dry grape nuts cereal. I know that's hard for your to visualize but think brownie pellets that you have to eat with a spoon.
That was her last attempt. Lucy has never cooked since.
18 years ago while we were dating...
She decided she wanted fried bacon. She knew what 'fry' meant. Pot full of oil. Turn heat up to high. She knew what bacon meant. Open pack of raw bacon, throw it into hot oil. There was an explosion of sorts.
16 years ago during 1st year of marriage...
She wanted to impress me by actually cooking a meal while I was in night class. She looked up a recipe for Salmon. Went to the grocery and bought ingredients. When I got home she served it. It was green. I took a bite and said "I'm sorry, dear, I can't eat this." She tried a bite and said "That's OK, I can't eat it either."
We put our plates on the floor for the black lab (who will eat anything). The dog sniffed it and walked away.
12 years ago... After 4 years of not trying her hand at cooking she said that she volunteered to make brownies for the Xmas party at work. They came out smelling and tasting like brownies. But they were the size and consistency of dry grape nuts cereal. I know that's hard for your to visualize but think brownie pellets that you have to eat with a spoon.
That was her last attempt. Lucy has never cooked since.
3
Posted on 4/7/13 at 3:38 pm to Zach
I haven't cooked anything too adventurous so no real cooking screw-ups other than dropping a pizza topping side down on the floor when taking it out of the oven. I was so pissed. I was house sitting and there was no food in the house and I was a wee bit drunk and it was 3am.
Oh, a few years back, I finished a steak in the oven and due to alcohol, I forgot it had been in the over and I grabbed the handle to tilt the pan to spoon some of the juices on the steak. OUCH!!!
Oh, a few years back, I finished a steak in the oven and due to alcohol, I forgot it had been in the over and I grabbed the handle to tilt the pan to spoon some of the juices on the steak. OUCH!!!
Posted on 4/7/13 at 4:54 pm to Zach
Imagining rabbit shite isn't all too hard. 
This post was edited on 4/7/13 at 4:58 pm
Posted on 4/7/13 at 9:23 pm to Zach
Not to be rude, but how can she screw up brownies? Brownies are super easy to make, especially if you're using a box mix. Even from scratch, all you're doing is combining the ingredients in a bowl and pouring them into a sprayed Pyrex pan and baking for 30 minutes.
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