LSU Nation, hear me out before y’all burn my house down

LSU Nation, hear me out before y’all burn my house down:

We need a coach who treats the transfer portal like Tinder—swipe right on every 5-star with a pulse, ghost the busts, and never settle for “he’s got potential.”

Brian Kelly brought us khakis and dad jokes; time to hire someone who bleeds purple, gold, and a little bit of bourbon.

My short list:
1. **Lane Kiffin** – He’ll troll Bama on Twitter, win 10 games, and leave for the Dolphins in 18 months. Chaos is a ladder, baby.
2. **Deion Sanders** – Prime Time in Death Valley? Neon lights, gold grills, and a secondary that actually tackles. Nike stock triples overnight.
3. **Mike Leach (resurrected)** – We dig him up, Weekend at Bernie’s style, and let him Air Raid the SEC into oblivion. Opposing DCs will need therapy.
4. **Ed Orgeron (again)** – Just hear the roar: “GO TIGAS, CHER!” We win the Natty out of pure nostalgia and beignets.

Whoever it is, make ‘em sign a blood oath: no more 3rd-and-17 draw plays. Geaux or geaux home.

#FireTheKhakis #HireThePirate #LSU