re: Would you be bothered if you learned your son/daughter didn't stand for the pledge?

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So as a parent, would you want to know if your child was not standing for the pledge

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Yes.

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or do you think it's the child's decision?

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Also yes.

I wouldn’t compel them to stand for the pledge because doing that is meaningless, but I would explain what I believe and why and encourage them to consider that.