re: How to raise sons to be confident and successful today in a big city?

When they are small, read to them every night and then say prayers together before they go to sleep.
Tell them to always show up (that's 90 percent of life).
Teach them to always do their best.
Keep a positive attitude, good things will happen.
Play sports, they don't have to be the best just try their best. You learn more from losing than winning (how do you get better).
Join cubscouts then boysouts and make Eagle rank.
Volunteer, it's not all about them. Help other people, especially old folks and the disabled.
Keep them active with sports, scouts, school.
Take AP courses in HS, nothing less than a B.
Be involved with church and youth groups doing activities.
This is the formula we used with our 2 sons and they are both USAFA grads and pilots today.