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re: Let’s celebrate your failed marriage
Posted on 1/28/24 at 8:14 pm to fallguy_1978
Posted on 1/28/24 at 8:14 pm to fallguy_1978
quote:
Why did it fall apart after that long?
Score keeping, not able to meet each other's expectations, lack of understanding each other's perspective, selfish behaviors, holding on to power, and ultimately disrespect, anger, and lack of forgiveness.
I didn't take her warnings when she was giving them. I missed them completely. By the time she moved out, she was done. She wouldn't go to therapy, didn't want to do any family outings, date each other, or discuss our relationship.
I didn't agree with her choices, but I learned to respect them, from a distance. She had just as much say in our relationship, and if she wasn't ready to talk about us, she wasn't ready. My ex-wife doesn't like conflict, avoids it at all cost, and will stonewall. I used to push, wanting to "fix it now" and was unaware of our different communication styles.
I had to learn to reconcile our relationship in my own mind.
This post was edited on 1/28/24 at 8:16 pm
3
Posted on 1/28/24 at 8:27 pm to Will Cover
quote:
Score keeping, not able to meet each other's expectations, lack of understanding each other's perspective, selfish behaviors, holding on to power, and ultimately disrespect, anger, and lack of forgiveness.
Gotcha. We've been married a similar amount of time. I wish you both future luck and happiness
Posted on 2/2/24 at 3:02 pm to Will Cover
I am literally living this exact scenario right now. Been separated for 10 days. I'm sleeping in my office. We're speaking now, probably better than ever, but she doesn't know if she wants to continue the marriage. I'm at a loss and hoping we can resolve it but it doesn't look good.
Posted on 2/2/24 at 3:12 pm to Will Cover
quote:
Score keeping, not able to meet each other's expectations, lack of understanding each other's perspective, selfish behaviors, holding on to power, and ultimately disrespect, anger, and lack of forgiveness. I didn't take her warnings when she was giving them. I missed them completely. By the time she moved out, she was done. She wouldn't go to therapy, didn't want to do any family outings, date each other, or discuss our relationship. I didn't agree with her choices, but I learned to respect them, from a distance. She had just as much say in our relationship, and if she wasn't ready to talk about us, she wasn't ready. My ex-wife doesn't like conflict, avoids it at all cost, and will stonewall. I used to push, wanting to "fix it now" and was unaware of our different communication styles. I had to learn to reconcile our relationship in my own mind.
What shitty excuses to get a divorce.
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