re: Have you ever experienced "arrival fallacy"?

Yes.

When I was younger, I thought making it to the big stage to perform music would be it. It would complete all the hard work I had put in and validate my identity as a real musician. But as those experiences grew, I felt less and less validated. It only opened up more issues with imposter syndrome or lack of fulfillment.

I once had my name on the bill opening up for a pretty big act at a festival. It was impressive. I got to ride around the festival in an escorted cart. Hang out backstage. There was special lighting planned for my show. Stage direction from a director. It was IT.

And it was nothing. Just a gig. It was fun and cool, don’t get me wrong. But that “I’ve arrived” never came. Just opened up additional worries and more thoughts on “what’s next?”

I’m currently working on my doctorate and feel prepared for the let down of finishing. Entering the program, I felt that same excitement for “arrival” when dreaming of the end when I would finish a PhD. But I think I can anticipate that it’s just another accomplishment that leads to new things.

I know this has become an essay of sorts, so to conclude, I actually think successful football coaches can teach people how to respond to the “gold medal syndrome.” The championship isn’t the finality of your work. It’s just part of the process. You can enjoy the moment briefly, but you have to have a disciplined process that you enjoy and understand. That’s when you’ve arrived.