re: "If you use more than 3 pieces of tape..."

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I find that human flesh conforms to the box much better than standard gift wrap. It's also a fun game for kids to guess what the tattoos meant to the person

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"If you use more than 3 pieces of tape..."

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The key here is interpretation. I can maybe make it work with 3 pieces of tape PER SIDE.

But the real secret is this: Let your wife or girlfriend shop for and wrap all the presents except hers. They tend to love that stuff - while listening to the 24 hour a day Christmas music station from like Halloween on of course. Then for hers, just stick a nice bow on your johnson and gift it to her.

Ok. That last part really only works like once and then only if your newlyweds (or the shack up equivalent for today's kids). And is best backed up by some jewelry.

Actually, the REAL real secret is just jewelry. If you can swing it find yourself a nice local jewelry store that you are comfortable with and you are set for years - you can go through all the major stones - diamonds, emeralds, rubies, onyx, saphire and more. And for each stone you can go through ear rings, bracelets, chains/necklaces and rings. At one piece a year (or major gift giving occasion if you're really too lazy to actually shop for birthdays and stuff) that'll get you pretty far. And the store will be happy to wrap them for you. Heck, they'll be happy to see you walk in the door.