re: Bring Back the AGGIE JOKES!!!!

A LSU Tiger fan, A&M Aggie fan, and Alabama Crimson Tide fan are all stuck on an island 1000 feet from shore. The Bama fan decides to try to swim to shore and makes it 250 feet, gets tired and swims back. The LSU fan decides to go for it and makes it 300 ft., but cant go any further and swims back. The Aggie fan decides to go for it. He makes it 500 ft., gets tired and swims back.

I was visiting another former Tiger down in Houston 2 years ago as Hurricane Ike approached.
To keep it simple the recomended evacuation routes were based on what certain groups would be familiar with , hence it would be smoother if the populace followed their natural inclinations.

The following was announced by the media!
Recomended evacuation routes:

1)Yankees, Sooners, rest of Big 12 I 45 North
2)Mexicans , drug dealers US Hwy 59 South
3)National Guard, Red Cross I 45 South
4)left coasters, Texas nationalist(Alamo) I 10 West
5)Longhorns & other real Texans US Hwy. 290 West
6)Coonasses and other Tiger fans , Gators I 10 East
7)Rednecks , Hillbillies , rest of the SEC. US Hwy. 59 North
8)Texas AM Aggies..............I 610 LOOP!

This aggie's girlfriend finally agreed to go all the way. Lacking any previous sexual experiences with human females, he was a little nervous when she demanded that he first go to the pharmacy to get some condoms.

The aggie went up to the counter and asked the pharmacist, " How much for box of them rubbers?"

The pharmacist replied, "Ten dollars" and the aggie proceeded to put a ten dollar bill on the counter.

Then the phamacist said, "No, that will be ten dollars and eighty cents total."

The aggie replied, "But you said it was ten dollars!! What's the extra eighty cents for?"

"Tax", said the pharmacist.

At first the aggie looked confused, but then smiled and said, "Oh I get it now!! You know I always wondered how those things stayed on!!"

Did you hear what the Aggie Vet Dept named their new pet Zebra??


Spot

Here is an oldie but a goodie, my favorite Aggie joke - sort of long but stay with me


One day a Great Commander developed at A&M, and he decided to form and train an army of 5000 loyal Aggie troops so he could invade Louisiana and kill all of the Cajuns living there.

So for a solid year, they trained like special forces troops until they were honed to a fine edge. So the Commander decided the time was right, his army was ready, and he started marching on La.

When he got to the Sabine River, he looked across and saw this one little Cajun standing on top of a small hill, waving and smiling at him - friendly and welcoming as most Cajuns are. So the Commander called his 2 best soldiers and told them - swim the river and go over there and kill that Cajun and report back to me when finished.

So his 2 best soldiers saluted, swam the Sabine, climbed the hill and as they were climbing the hill, the little Cajun disappeared down the back side of the hill and the 2 Aggie soldiers followed him. After about 30 minutes and his soldiers had not reported back, the Aggie Commander led his remaining army to the hill and on the back side found his 2 best soldiers dead.

Since these were his 2 best soldiers, the Commander could not figure out what happened. Then he looked over at the next hill and there was the same friendly little Cajun waving and smiling at him. For the sake of brevity I will shorten the story here. Commander gave orders for 10, then 20, then 100 then finally half of his remaining troops and each time the same thing happened, all of his soldiers killed, except the last time using half of his troops.

This time when he topped the hill, it looked like a great battle had occurred, dead and mutilated bodies everywhere and he found one soldier still alive but mortally wounded.

So quickly he rushed to his mortally wounded soldier, grabbed him by the collar and said - "Soldier, you are mortally wounded so please quickly tell me what happened before you die". And with his last dying breath the soldier replied - "Commander, go back, it is a trap. There are 2 of them!!!"

It was the Aggie's first day of school and his momma was teaching him how to put on his underwear..
"Yellow spots to the front, brown spots to the back"...she said.

The girlfriend said to the Aggie, please kiss me where it's dirty and nasty.

So, he took her to Beaumont.

quote:

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He makes it 500 ft., gets tired and swims back.

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God, I hope that most of the posters here can do the math and figure that one out!

Did you hear about the aggie who locked the keys in his car?

It took him nearly 2 hours to get his family out.