re: What are some good side gigs?

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No one will pay to see my fat arse.

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What you perceive as a roadblock is your actual meal ticket. Show up to some rando’s location (preferably in a public setting), outside dining, park... and get to business. You may find people will pay to not have to look at you in your skivvies. As long as it’s public property, and you don’t show your peen, you could bank depending on how gross you actually are.