re: What qualities did you look for in your spouse?

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My first go around was someone who had a common personality, but I found that over time it was easy to get into a rut and we never pushed each other outside of our comfort zones to experience new things. Wondering if I should try someone who has an opposite personality so we fill gaps.

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Its a little of both, IMO.

"Opposites attract" goes too far.

If my idea of a good time on a weekend is tailgating, going out with other couples sometimes, attending fun events, etc. (basically doing things together that we don't do during the work week) but my SO has social anxiety and hates anything besides watching Netflix on the couch for weeks at a time.. we are fundamentally incompatible.

Obviously, you and your SO are going to have some different hobbies/interests. Everyone does. But (in my opinion) a relationship is not about the grand picture - it is about the day to day living. And if you both have very different ideas of what constitutes your default lifestyle, you're just not going to work. That goes for money, moral beliefs, social activities, etc.