re: Is committing suicide by someone who has suffered tremendous loss excusable?

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but that doesn’t mean it’s not selfish

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You're looking at it from your point of view. So that would mean that it is a selfish act to you. People who commit suicide are not in the right state of mind to know what they are about to do is selfish. To commit a final act is beyond my comprehension. How dark, cold, and lonely of a place one might be to take such action. I personally think it has t do with mental health, not being able to understand that nothng is permanent except suicide.

No matter what the situation is there is always a way out, always.

I can not express this enough. If you are close with anybody that has hinted at being depressed. Reach out to them. Don't wait for them to reach out to you. Pester them in a way that they know you'll be there for them no matter what. Tell them you care.

Personally, I've lost friendships do to my own depression. And realizing the type of people I was hanging around with were fake and only being there when it was convenient for them. You realize a lot about who people really are when you are at your lowest. But one thing will always stay with me, and that is having one of my buddies call me or text me every week just to shoot the proverbial bullshite. That, among other things is what I needed to get my personal demons layed to rest.

shite luck will find anybody, nobody is immune to it. Don't ever hesitate to do what is right. Reach out.