re: George Carlin on Climate Change

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I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.

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I used to be Irish Catholic. Now I’m an American — you know, you grow

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The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”

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You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.

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As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero, he no longer is.

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Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.”

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