re: 401k meeting today. Right way to ask about high fees??

there's a report that's created annually breaking down the fees. You probably have access to it online. investment expenses (1% average unless its an index), advisor compensation (.25-.5% usually), provider charges (.4-.5%), and third party advisor fees ($25 per participant/yr + plus cost to do tax return, etc. I'd imagine 1.3-1.5% total is average especially for plans under $3 million.