re: Is it ok for your girlfriend to go to an Ex's family member funeral?

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This whole situation stinks bud. Judging by the facts, the PIIHB crowd is likely wrong. It is feasible that they open the talking channels. I would be more upset about the change of plans and the lack of respect for you than the actual going to the funeral. 8 years is a long time, definitely long enough to get emotionally attached to family outside of the actual boyfriend. This just has "walk all over you" written all over it, and that lack of mutual respect isn't healthy unless you are leaving out the fact that you two had an actual conversation with everything on the table. I doubt it though considering the existence of this thread.

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This is it exactly...
No matter how much you trust her, and even if she does nothing wrong. She changed your family's plans to be with his family. That's not ok.

As I said earlier, "if you choose to go there, stay there, and consider yourself single."