I have a few -

Left work one night from the bar, driving down canal st to go visit my buddy working another bar, at about 4:00 am. Cruising down canal street, sipping a longneck when I look up and see lights in the mirror. I shove beer under passenger seat, pull over and turn on dome light. Cop says get out so I do, and realize there are 3 cop cars behind me. I'm like "oh frick". Cop says I was flying, passed right by them, etc etc. I say I just got off, dropped the bar name, going home to study.

Then he says "give me your registration, license and insurance." I say "here's my license, but I don't have registration, insurance or a brake tag." I explain my windshields got smashed a month back, I took the stuff out so it wouldn't get wet in case of rain, just got the car back and forgot to grab the papers. But I did have a new insurance card int he back seat backpack that started in like a week.

So, I go to get it, and the cop sees my gun holster on my belt, with no gun in it, screams "GUN!", yanks me back out of the car. I'm all hands in the air going "whoa frick, sorry, totally forgot... gun is under the seat [other cop goes to [passenger seat where I shoved the beer]... no not that seat... here's the receipt for the gun, it's all legal, I am so sorry etc etc"

Five minutes later, cop hands me back the gun and bullets, says "We were looking for someone else. Drive a little slower. " No ticket.

As i drove off, i remembered i also had a bag of weed in my pocket.

-- Senior year of high school, driving to school with my buddy, we were smoking a joint when I drove into a school zone speed trap. Cop says to pull over up there, so as I'm doing that I'm telling my buddy "eat that joint now!" So I pull over, cop comes up, I'm handing him my papers, when I look over and realize my buddy didn't eat the fricking joint, he's just holding it between his legs, I can see the smoke swirling up. Cop walks off, I'm like "eat the fricking joint!" He doesn't, but he does put it out. Cop comes back, gives me a ticket and my papers back and says "slow down." As I'm driving away, I also realize I had weed all over my shirt from when I was rolling the joint.

-- And once, we were flying up state street, when the lights went on behind us, we took the next right, pulled in a driveway, shut everything off and laid down. Cop drove right by.

This post was edited on 4/23/14 at 12:55 pm