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re: TD Music Board Original CopyPasta Thread
Posted on 5/9/14 at 1:00 am to HeadyBrosevelt
Posted on 5/9/14 at 1:00 am to HeadyBrosevelt
Everyone knows that an evening at Red Lobster is no small affair. I press my jeans, put on my finest hair product, and drench myself in a musky cologne. Hell, I may even shine up my wing tipped shoes, for I am going to Red Lobster. I strut through the door with my finest lady on my arm and throw up two fingers to the Hostess. I glide past the lobster tank with ease knowing that yet again I will not be eating a red lobster at Red Lobster (who would). I take a seat and before the waiter asks us for our drinks I request 20 cheddar bay biscuits. It's such a bold move that music stops, glasses clink, and everyone in a 5 yard radius gasps in disbelief/shock. Even my company gives me a look of concern. The waiter says " s..sir are you sure?". I don't sweat one bit and I tell that waiter to step and make with the cbb's. he comes back with three baskets filled with biscuits (7 in 2 and 6 in another). I thank the waiter. Then I go straight baller!!!! I'm pounding biszcuits left and right. Smashing them in old dudes faces, rubbing them between my ladies titties, telling the waiter to frick off. I cause a ruckus, only get cbb's, don't pay a dime, and leave with my girl plus three more.That's generally what happens every time I go to Red Lobster, I've gotten banned from 33 locations.
Posted on 5/9/14 at 1:02 am to Burt Reynolds
Oh, and I am a real lawyer. I've also really done all of the following things:
- been in non-public areas of the White House
- produced papers that were put into the hands of the President
- had my picture taken with the President
- attended a private briefing with the First Lady
- sat in the President's box at the Kennedy Center
- sat in the office chair of a well-known Presidential candidate
- had a private lunch with at least one Senator
- had lunch in the private Senate dining room
- been to a private party with two (different) Senators, and two political talk-show hosts
- had drinks with a (different) Senator in his chambers
- been told an off-color joke by a (different, and of course Republican) Senator
- represented three Members of Congress in communications with the public
- been one of four people in a meeting with the Mayor of a top-3 American city
- had drinks (and been at a Dead show) with the Deputy Mayor of a (different) top-3 American city
- been sought out as a source by one of the top reporters on cable news
And all of that was over a decade ago, before I turned 24.
- been in non-public areas of the White House
- produced papers that were put into the hands of the President
- had my picture taken with the President
- attended a private briefing with the First Lady
- sat in the President's box at the Kennedy Center
- sat in the office chair of a well-known Presidential candidate
- had a private lunch with at least one Senator
- had lunch in the private Senate dining room
- been to a private party with two (different) Senators, and two political talk-show hosts
- had drinks with a (different) Senator in his chambers
- been told an off-color joke by a (different, and of course Republican) Senator
- represented three Members of Congress in communications with the public
- been one of four people in a meeting with the Mayor of a top-3 American city
- had drinks (and been at a Dead show) with the Deputy Mayor of a (different) top-3 American city
- been sought out as a source by one of the top reporters on cable news
And all of that was over a decade ago, before I turned 24.
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