re: Wife is mad because I won't go to in laws twice in three weeks

Honestly, for me, the drive just adds insult to injury. Expecting grown adults, especially without children, to sleep over at your home 10 to 12 times a year for multiple nights is pretty crazy.

I did see that OP clarified this isn’t really something her parents are demanding or expecting, but rather something his wife is stuck on.

OP, if I were you, I would sit down with her when you’re not fighting about it and just explain your mismatched expectations. Maybe you can come to a compromise. Personally, I think the frequency you’re going would be too much, but I realize everybody treats seeing family in person differently. Maybe that is your compromise.