re: What's your favorite Mitch Hedberg joke?

My two favorite:


"Every book is a children's book if the kid can read."




"You know when you go to a restaurant on the weekends, it's busy, so they start a waiting list? They start calling out names, they say "Dufrane, party of two. Table ready for Dufrane, party of two." And if no one answers, they'll say their name again. "Dufrane, party of two." But then if no one answers they'll just go right on to the next name. "Bush, party of three." Yeah, but what happened to the Dufranes? No one seems to care. Who can eat at a time like this? People are missing. You people are selfish. The Dufranes are in someone's trunk right now, with duct tape over their mouths. And they're hungry - that's a double whammy. We need help. "Bush, SEARCH party of three! You can eat once you find the Dufranes."