re: Do you feel like you sacrificed your personality for your wife, family, career?

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quote:so there’s little time for anything outside of hanging out with the wife and getting ready for bed. By no means am I an expert, but this sounds very unhealthy.

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You’re right. It is.

I’ve posted before about my situation here. My days start at 4am, have to be at work by 530. I try to leave by 530pm, and I have an hour commute home. With my kids activities schedule lately, I usually have to pick my daughter up from dance, so on most nights I don’t get home until after 730.

I technically work 4-10s, but over the last two years I’ve ended up either working on Friday or on the phone all day more often than not. I can’t remember the last time I truly didn’t have a bunch to do on a Friday. For example, my wife was gone this weekend for work. I got 27 phone calls over the three days I was “off.” I never got to work remotely during Covid. I was busier than most people.

Weekends are packed with stuff. There’s always a birthday party, or somewhere to go, or family wants us to come over, or whatever.

I haven’t played golf since last spring. I haven’t been fishing this year. Hell it’s a struggle just to find time to squeeze in cutting grass. Nevermind leisure activities.

I’ve started to accept that this is my life now. It’s the same thing every week. Part of me wants to find a job in another state, and just pick the family up and move somewhere where we won’t have to live away from work, we won’t have to pay for private school, and we actually can have relationships with people outside of work. I know not having family close by will be a challenge, but I also won’t have people trying to compete for monopolizing our time. I often wonder if we would be happier.