re: Question about teen daughter keeping computer in her room at night

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I'm willing to bet school issued computers block porn sites and other things you're worried about.

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Illicit websites are the least of the problems. The number one threat to teenage girls on the internet are older guys trolling for teenage girls and trying to arrange a hook up. Has happened to two families in my area both girls had never been done anything wrong before, were popular, and did well in school. One of them got caught with the 25 year old dude in her bedroom in the middle of the night. Teenage girls, hormones, and the internet can be a recipe for disaster.

Whatever it is that you're trying to keep her from doing by taking the laptop, she'll find a way to do. Teens have a knack for deceiving parents.

Have to admit, that has crossed my mind, usually after the fact. I think once my parents pass away I will give up porn.

I don't mind it right now so much because my grandpa and great-grandparents in heaven are probably just so amazed at seeing teenage latinas giving blowjobs and getting bent over the side of the bed that they don't even notice me jerking it.

Having my mom see that shite would just be creepy. I hope she lives to 110.

Every single idiot in here telling you to let her do what she wants is a 22 year old loser who spent all of last night trying to talk a 14 year old into sending nudes.

That's who I was talking too on seeking arrangement last night, I thought she was lying about her age.

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A 14 year old girl was naked in her room and using FaceTime on her laptop and talking to an older boy that I know. Depends on how much you trust your daughter.

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Aside from whether or not she may misuse the computer, you also run into the fact that it is a distraction that can keep her up late (even if just chatting innocently online). At this age, the kids need sleep. Would you rather her be upset that her computer is downstairs, or upset because her grades are slipping from being fatigued at school. 14 year old kids aren't known for decision making or impulse control. Parents are responsible for setting boundaries when the teen's judgement is impaired.

In talking to my friends that are teachers it seems like most parents don't want to do the hard work of parenting (setting boundaries, providing discipline, etc. etc.). You aren't meant to be her best friend. That can come after she is grown.

Current college student checking in,

Know a few that were heavily sheltered that went crazy
One guy got hooked on green which then lead to acid and such, stopped going to class, failed out, smart dude too

Parenting, for me, is about teaching them to make the right choices once your no longer around to force them to make the right decision. Could your daughter go on to be a successful person with these current rules? Absolutely. However she could also rebel once she gets the chance. I know a bunch of people who went all out in college once they got out from under the watchful eye of mom and dad. I'm not saying they aren't still functioning members of society, just saying people usually find a way to get into their fair share of mischief.

If it was me I would start allowing her to keep it an hour longer every month with the same rules, that it had to be off after bed time. I would keep the ability to monitor if its on and punish her if she disobeys. That way you give her the choice to make the right decision with you acting as a safety net so the consequences aren't dire.

Different strokes for different folks. Chances are with parents who love her and encourage her she will be fine.