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paullentz1972
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| Number of Posts: | 4 |
| Registered on: | 6/23/2025 |
| Online Status: | Not Online |
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re: NYT- Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back.
Posted by paullentz1972 on 6/24/25 at 8:11 pm to SquatchDawg
I dont deal with the 'opposite sex' anymore. I gave up dating (or any hope of ever getting married) back in 2007 (when I was 35) because I got tired of dealing with women who kept giving me shite for watching football on Sundays. I couldnt put my finger on it at the time....I just knew that there was an imbalance in dating that left me unsatisfied.
Fast forward to 2025 (I'm 53 now) and I literally live life on Easy Mode! No drama, no stress, no angst in my life...while coming home to a peaceful home each and every day! I have plenty of free time to partake in activities that bring me actual pleasure without having to explain/justify myself to some emotional/moody/impossible to please female. My expenses are low...I'm more than able to live within my means.
It's amazing how easy life is..when a man gives up chasing tail! I love the freedom I have to say what's on my mind/keeping it real.
And yes, I am totally right when it comes to what you quoted me as saying. The three phrases you listed...hit the nail on the head when it comes to modern day females. And here's one more: "Most women would rather believe a comfortable lie, than a painful truth".
Fast forward to 2025 (I'm 53 now) and I literally live life on Easy Mode! No drama, no stress, no angst in my life...while coming home to a peaceful home each and every day! I have plenty of free time to partake in activities that bring me actual pleasure without having to explain/justify myself to some emotional/moody/impossible to please female. My expenses are low...I'm more than able to live within my means.
It's amazing how easy life is..when a man gives up chasing tail! I love the freedom I have to say what's on my mind/keeping it real.
And yes, I am totally right when it comes to what you quoted me as saying. The three phrases you listed...hit the nail on the head when it comes to modern day females. And here's one more: "Most women would rather believe a comfortable lie, than a painful truth".
1
re: NYT- Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back.
Posted by paullentz1972 on 6/24/25 at 7:59 pm to LaLadyinTx
If what you are saying about yourself (you being the logical/factual one who is not emotional at all)...then you are indeed The Exception to The Rule...NOT The Rule (when it comes to how emotional/moody/bored/needs to be entertained and constantly validated women are)!
You have to understand what most men are used to dealing with when it comes to most women...and not take it personally if a guy you happen to be interested in is initially 'jaded' when it comes to being weary of a woman being 'that way'. If you stay consistent and show that you arent 'that woman'...then you should not have a problem attracting a decent guy.
Believe me....most guys 'notice' a woman who isnt 'that woman' IF she's willing to be a little patient in the getting to know someone stage of dating.
You have to understand what most men are used to dealing with when it comes to most women...and not take it personally if a guy you happen to be interested in is initially 'jaded' when it comes to being weary of a woman being 'that way'. If you stay consistent and show that you arent 'that woman'...then you should not have a problem attracting a decent guy.
Believe me....most guys 'notice' a woman who isnt 'that woman' IF she's willing to be a little patient in the getting to know someone stage of dating.
re: NYT- Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back.
Posted by paullentz1972 on 6/24/25 at 7:49 pm to LaLadyinTx
Which men are you talking about who want a "sugar mama, a caretaker, a cook and a housekeeper"? I find it hard to believe that 'the men' that women like you want (men in their 60's as well, who have their shite together, physically/mentally/financially)....are looking for a "sugar mama, a caretaker, a cook and a housekeeper". 'Those guys'....probably are looking for women younger than you. 'Those guys'....are in HUGE demand (even by younger women...as well as women your age).
Since you are widowed and glowed about your 34 year old marriage...I assume that you're pretty 'well off financially' (if so, good for you). However, MOST MEN (regardless of their age) are not 'well off financially'. In reality, there are men 'your age' who ARE NOT looking for "a sugar mama, a caretaker, a cook and a housekeeper". However, most of these guys ARE NOT well off financially. Now does that mean that they are broke? Of course not. However, most men your age who are single (who are decent guys)....probably were wrecked during a divorce. While they may not be broke, they aint rich either.
You might want to think about how much it costs to do the things that you want to do....and consider how much it would cost 'the average guy' to 'go dutch' with you on activities/dates, etc. While money may not be an issue for you.....you might want to do the math when it comes to what % of the male population (men your age) who potentially have the kind of disposable income you may have.
There are good, decent men out there around your age who would be open to a meaningful, committed, monogamous relationship. Just because some of these guys may not be able to afford doing the things that you like to do....does not mean that they want to leech off you! There are plenty of things to do that are low cost (or even free). It's the quality of the time you spend together...NOT how much it costs to do something.
When I was much younger, I dated a lady who made significantly more money than me at that time. I told her that I had no problem with her making really good money....and that I wasnt looking to leech off her. I said that I'm ok with doing things and paying my share...as long as it was affordable. However if she wanted to do something pricey with me....she'd have to pay, lol. She said, no problem. I never expected her to do so....I just was upfront with her in the beginning.
I feel that when it comes to dating...most women really have a hard time reconciling the math when it comes to potentially what % of men out there are able to satisfy the checkmarks they are seeking in a man...AS WELL as what their competition is for 'those guys'. Most women just assume that the type of man they are looking for 'grow on trees' AND that 'that guy' is only looking for a woman like her, lol.
You listed what you were looking for. Did you even ponder the above? Or...did you just take the "I know what I want...why is it so hard to find it" position?
I dont care how old a woman is (whether early 20's...or early 60's)....most of you are basically looking for the SAME TYPE OF GUY (who tend to be a very small % of men out there). 'Those guys'....have all the leverage in the world..because you ladies GIVE IT TO THEM! 'Those guys'....literally have their pick of the litter! Why should/would 'those guys' only pick one?
Most men....have a hard enough time getting ONE female to pay them the time of day! Most men....do not have the option to cheat! However, the small % of men that most of you ladies want.....know that in reality, they are 'the prize'...not you ladies! When something is 'rare'...it's valuable! So yes, if women like you want 'that guy'....you're likely going to have to be willing to be compliant with what he wants (or he'll likely ghost you and pick from the plethora of options that guys like him have to choose from who are more than willing to be on his program).
Since you are widowed and glowed about your 34 year old marriage...I assume that you're pretty 'well off financially' (if so, good for you). However, MOST MEN (regardless of their age) are not 'well off financially'. In reality, there are men 'your age' who ARE NOT looking for "a sugar mama, a caretaker, a cook and a housekeeper". However, most of these guys ARE NOT well off financially. Now does that mean that they are broke? Of course not. However, most men your age who are single (who are decent guys)....probably were wrecked during a divorce. While they may not be broke, they aint rich either.
You might want to think about how much it costs to do the things that you want to do....and consider how much it would cost 'the average guy' to 'go dutch' with you on activities/dates, etc. While money may not be an issue for you.....you might want to do the math when it comes to what % of the male population (men your age) who potentially have the kind of disposable income you may have.
There are good, decent men out there around your age who would be open to a meaningful, committed, monogamous relationship. Just because some of these guys may not be able to afford doing the things that you like to do....does not mean that they want to leech off you! There are plenty of things to do that are low cost (or even free). It's the quality of the time you spend together...NOT how much it costs to do something.
When I was much younger, I dated a lady who made significantly more money than me at that time. I told her that I had no problem with her making really good money....and that I wasnt looking to leech off her. I said that I'm ok with doing things and paying my share...as long as it was affordable. However if she wanted to do something pricey with me....she'd have to pay, lol. She said, no problem. I never expected her to do so....I just was upfront with her in the beginning.
I feel that when it comes to dating...most women really have a hard time reconciling the math when it comes to potentially what % of men out there are able to satisfy the checkmarks they are seeking in a man...AS WELL as what their competition is for 'those guys'. Most women just assume that the type of man they are looking for 'grow on trees' AND that 'that guy' is only looking for a woman like her, lol.
You listed what you were looking for. Did you even ponder the above? Or...did you just take the "I know what I want...why is it so hard to find it" position?
I dont care how old a woman is (whether early 20's...or early 60's)....most of you are basically looking for the SAME TYPE OF GUY (who tend to be a very small % of men out there). 'Those guys'....have all the leverage in the world..because you ladies GIVE IT TO THEM! 'Those guys'....literally have their pick of the litter! Why should/would 'those guys' only pick one?
Most men....have a hard enough time getting ONE female to pay them the time of day! Most men....do not have the option to cheat! However, the small % of men that most of you ladies want.....know that in reality, they are 'the prize'...not you ladies! When something is 'rare'...it's valuable! So yes, if women like you want 'that guy'....you're likely going to have to be willing to be compliant with what he wants (or he'll likely ghost you and pick from the plethora of options that guys like him have to choose from who are more than willing to be on his program).
re: NYT- Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back.
Posted by paullentz1972 on 6/23/25 at 9:59 pm to Hou_Lawyer
I read this whole article. In 'theory' what this lady lamented about, seems, um, 'reasonable'.
HOWEVER, she left out 'one' word when she said 'Men' where have you gone, please come back: "HOT" Men.....
I keep saying this over and over....the problem for most of these modern day Chad Chasing/Bad Boy Boning females...is that there simply arent enough of 'these guys' to go around for all the females out there who hella crave them some Chad Man Meat/Bad Boy Bone!
A non-Chad/non-Bad Boy can make all the money in the world AND become a workout warrior...YET at the end of the day, all he'll EVER be in the eyes of most women is a non-Chad/non-Bad Boy with money and muscles.....at best, a back-up option, subject to the 56% of marriages that end in divorce (with women initiating 78% of all divorces). The very reason why Rom-Coms are so popular amongst women...is because most women can relate to 'settling' down with a man that they arent naturally sexually attracted to (btw, how do you think that makes MOST men really feel?).
A growing % of men have checked out of the dating scene (I did so back in 2007)....because more and more men are getting hip to the fact that most men ARE NOT what most women want! Why should most men do all it takes to attract a woman....IF most women only want 'that guy'?
Most women rate 80% of men as being 'below a 5'. Most women reject most men....most women totally ignore most men. YET, most women seem to believe that if they can convince most men to keep 'competing' for them...that the men that they really want (Chads/Bad Boy-types) will eventually 'wise up' and start committing and being faithful. TOTAL DE-LU-LU on the part of these modern day Chad Chasing/Bad Boy Boning females! 'These guys' know that they DO NOT have competition. 'They' know that most women crave them some Chad Man Meat/Bad Boy Bone....and that most women will put up with their Red Flags. Knowing this...why would/should ANY of 'these guys' EVER pick 'just one'?
Ladies, by being so freaking PICKY....collectively, you ladies have given 'these guys' all the leverage in The World! 'These guys' know that most of you will continue to put up with 'their shite'! What are you going to do? Revise who makes you 'tingle down there'? You ladies collectively let 'these guys' continue to RUN THROUGH YOU over and over again.....YET women keep thinking that eventually things will change, lol! NOT HAPPENING....especially if you ladies keep being so damn picky when it comes to your PREFERENCES!
And what PREFERENCES are those? 1. a man being at least 6 feet tall (off the bat, that eliminates 87% of men. However, of the 13% of men that are at least 6 feet tall....half of those guys are MARRIED. So now you're down to 6.5% of men who are at least 6 feet tall AND single. However, 10% of those guys are either gay OR in prison. So now you're down to 5.85% of men who are single, straight, free and at least 6 feet tall! And that's not even including the following checkmarks!)....2. have a great smile...3. have broad shoulders...4. have amazing, striking eyes...5. have a strong, pronounced chin....6. have a head full of hair.
And that's not even including...7. is he funny...8. does he have great conversational ability...9. does he make in excess of $100k a year (in excess....significantly in excess).....10. is he great in bed/is he packing 'where it counts' (let's be real...most women crave sex just as much as men do. The problem for most women..is that there simply arent enough Chads/Bad Boy-types to go around for all the women who crave them some Chad Man Meat/Bad Boy Bone).
Now what % of men do you ladies really believe hits most if not all of the above 10 checkmarks? Men do not determine what makes a man a Chad/Bad Boy-type....WOMEN DO! These are the men that most of you ladies will have sex with on the first date/will have situationships with/will have one night stands with/will have friends with benefits with. In addition, most women wont make 'these guys' pay for the first date/wont make 'these men' wait for sex/wont make 'these men' commit or be faithful! Most women will tolerate hella Red Flags from 'these guys' that most of you would NEVER tolerate from most men.
So knowing all of this.....why would any SANE non-Chad/non-Bad Boy type EVER consider putting himself out there in today's dating climate? Most of you ladies have made it crystal clear that most of you have ZERO INTEREST in most men! And more and more of these non-Chads/non-Bad Boy types are finally getting the message! Men like us....we've checked out....and are taking solace in 'going out own way'!
And guess what? We (non-Chads/non-Bad Boys) like being by ourselves! As a result of not chasing after the unobtainable (most women today)....more and more men are discovering that a life with NO drama, NO stress, NO angst, NO arguing, NO conflict in our lives....while coming home to a peaceful home each and every day....is FAN-frickING-TASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!! Our expenses are much lower....we're able to live within our means....and we can save money (if we choose)! In addition, we have plenty of free time to partake in activities that bring us actual pleasure WITHOUT having to explain/justify to some emotional/moody/argumentative/impossible to please female.
How hard is that to understand?
So unless most of you females who ARE NOT a legit '10' in the looks department (contrary to 'popular' belief amongst women today....most women ARE NOT '10's/boss babes/queens', lol)....are willing to be more REALISTIC when it comes to your PREFERENCES (which I'm 99.9999999999999999999999999% sure wont happen), I dont see anything changing anytime soon when it comes to the dissatisfaction that is called modern dating!
Having standards are one things...being DE-LU-LU when it comes to your PREFERENCES is a totally different thing. And if you dont know the difference between a preference AND a standard....I dont know what to say! If you dont know where you realistically rate on a scale of 1-10 physically....I dont know what to say.
HOWEVER, she left out 'one' word when she said 'Men' where have you gone, please come back: "HOT" Men.....
I keep saying this over and over....the problem for most of these modern day Chad Chasing/Bad Boy Boning females...is that there simply arent enough of 'these guys' to go around for all the females out there who hella crave them some Chad Man Meat/Bad Boy Bone!
A non-Chad/non-Bad Boy can make all the money in the world AND become a workout warrior...YET at the end of the day, all he'll EVER be in the eyes of most women is a non-Chad/non-Bad Boy with money and muscles.....at best, a back-up option, subject to the 56% of marriages that end in divorce (with women initiating 78% of all divorces). The very reason why Rom-Coms are so popular amongst women...is because most women can relate to 'settling' down with a man that they arent naturally sexually attracted to (btw, how do you think that makes MOST men really feel?).
A growing % of men have checked out of the dating scene (I did so back in 2007)....because more and more men are getting hip to the fact that most men ARE NOT what most women want! Why should most men do all it takes to attract a woman....IF most women only want 'that guy'?
Most women rate 80% of men as being 'below a 5'. Most women reject most men....most women totally ignore most men. YET, most women seem to believe that if they can convince most men to keep 'competing' for them...that the men that they really want (Chads/Bad Boy-types) will eventually 'wise up' and start committing and being faithful. TOTAL DE-LU-LU on the part of these modern day Chad Chasing/Bad Boy Boning females! 'These guys' know that they DO NOT have competition. 'They' know that most women crave them some Chad Man Meat/Bad Boy Bone....and that most women will put up with their Red Flags. Knowing this...why would/should ANY of 'these guys' EVER pick 'just one'?
Ladies, by being so freaking PICKY....collectively, you ladies have given 'these guys' all the leverage in The World! 'These guys' know that most of you will continue to put up with 'their shite'! What are you going to do? Revise who makes you 'tingle down there'? You ladies collectively let 'these guys' continue to RUN THROUGH YOU over and over again.....YET women keep thinking that eventually things will change, lol! NOT HAPPENING....especially if you ladies keep being so damn picky when it comes to your PREFERENCES!
And what PREFERENCES are those? 1. a man being at least 6 feet tall (off the bat, that eliminates 87% of men. However, of the 13% of men that are at least 6 feet tall....half of those guys are MARRIED. So now you're down to 6.5% of men who are at least 6 feet tall AND single. However, 10% of those guys are either gay OR in prison. So now you're down to 5.85% of men who are single, straight, free and at least 6 feet tall! And that's not even including the following checkmarks!)....2. have a great smile...3. have broad shoulders...4. have amazing, striking eyes...5. have a strong, pronounced chin....6. have a head full of hair.
And that's not even including...7. is he funny...8. does he have great conversational ability...9. does he make in excess of $100k a year (in excess....significantly in excess).....10. is he great in bed/is he packing 'where it counts' (let's be real...most women crave sex just as much as men do. The problem for most women..is that there simply arent enough Chads/Bad Boy-types to go around for all the women who crave them some Chad Man Meat/Bad Boy Bone).
Now what % of men do you ladies really believe hits most if not all of the above 10 checkmarks? Men do not determine what makes a man a Chad/Bad Boy-type....WOMEN DO! These are the men that most of you ladies will have sex with on the first date/will have situationships with/will have one night stands with/will have friends with benefits with. In addition, most women wont make 'these guys' pay for the first date/wont make 'these men' wait for sex/wont make 'these men' commit or be faithful! Most women will tolerate hella Red Flags from 'these guys' that most of you would NEVER tolerate from most men.
So knowing all of this.....why would any SANE non-Chad/non-Bad Boy type EVER consider putting himself out there in today's dating climate? Most of you ladies have made it crystal clear that most of you have ZERO INTEREST in most men! And more and more of these non-Chads/non-Bad Boy types are finally getting the message! Men like us....we've checked out....and are taking solace in 'going out own way'!
And guess what? We (non-Chads/non-Bad Boys) like being by ourselves! As a result of not chasing after the unobtainable (most women today)....more and more men are discovering that a life with NO drama, NO stress, NO angst, NO arguing, NO conflict in our lives....while coming home to a peaceful home each and every day....is FAN-frickING-TASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!!! Our expenses are much lower....we're able to live within our means....and we can save money (if we choose)! In addition, we have plenty of free time to partake in activities that bring us actual pleasure WITHOUT having to explain/justify to some emotional/moody/argumentative/impossible to please female.
How hard is that to understand?
So unless most of you females who ARE NOT a legit '10' in the looks department (contrary to 'popular' belief amongst women today....most women ARE NOT '10's/boss babes/queens', lol)....are willing to be more REALISTIC when it comes to your PREFERENCES (which I'm 99.9999999999999999999999999% sure wont happen), I dont see anything changing anytime soon when it comes to the dissatisfaction that is called modern dating!
Having standards are one things...being DE-LU-LU when it comes to your PREFERENCES is a totally different thing. And if you dont know the difference between a preference AND a standard....I dont know what to say! If you dont know where you realistically rate on a scale of 1-10 physically....I dont know what to say.
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