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Started By
Message
re: Would You Take Your SO Back if Caught Cheating With Another Man
Posted on 2/15/14 at 5:57 pm to bencoleman
Posted on 2/15/14 at 5:57 pm to bencoleman
Bencoleman
I know that sick feelings well. I guess the best way I can over simplify my own experience with that sick feeling over the past 25 years is I hsve gone from feeling it every waking moment to several times a week to several times a month to a few times a year. My wife's spiritual, psychological and physical growth since those bad times nearly 30 years ago has enabled me to see the strength she has and there have been many times in the past 25 years she has helped me immensely. Overcoming her revelation to me was a long process and I guess just like grieving the death of someone you are very close to you never really " get over it" but you can choose how you handle any situation.
There was a time I used to wonder how I could handle seemly impossible situations (deaths if patents and friends, my wife having an affair, etc.) and dreading the thought that any of those situations would happen to me. Here I am 30+ years later having faced many of those things on that "seemingly impossible list" and I found out that I didn't have to deal with any of those traumas alone. That has been the key.
I know that sick feelings well. I guess the best way I can over simplify my own experience with that sick feeling over the past 25 years is I hsve gone from feeling it every waking moment to several times a week to several times a month to a few times a year. My wife's spiritual, psychological and physical growth since those bad times nearly 30 years ago has enabled me to see the strength she has and there have been many times in the past 25 years she has helped me immensely. Overcoming her revelation to me was a long process and I guess just like grieving the death of someone you are very close to you never really " get over it" but you can choose how you handle any situation.
There was a time I used to wonder how I could handle seemly impossible situations (deaths if patents and friends, my wife having an affair, etc.) and dreading the thought that any of those situations would happen to me. Here I am 30+ years later having faced many of those things on that "seemingly impossible list" and I found out that I didn't have to deal with any of those traumas alone. That has been the key.
2
Posted on 2/15/14 at 7:43 pm to LSUandAU
quote:
When my first wife ran around cheating on me due to diagnosed mental issues, lack of maturity, inability to handle our kids and jealousy that I attended to them more than to her...I hired a PI, filed for divorce, received finalization of the at-fault divorce in 30 days, along with custody of our young children, and she paid me child support of $900 per month for 15 years!
Grown arse man right here. Take notes beta's, this is how you handle that situation.
Posted on 2/15/14 at 8:04 pm to NorthTiger
You sir, are a better man than me...My size 11.5 foot/shoe would be so far up her arse she wouldn't want another pecker afterwards 
Posted on 2/15/14 at 8:09 pm to shutterspeed
frick no
Posted on 2/15/14 at 8:18 pm to Geaux-2-L-O-Miss
LOL frick NO
Posted on 2/15/14 at 8:43 pm to shutterspeed
I don't get the qualifier. Seems line the ridiculously large sex organ would be salt in the wound. Is it supposed to mitigate the circumstance? Is anyone saying "well I was going to end it, but since it was a huge cock I guess it's cool"
Posted on 2/15/14 at 8:58 pm to shutterspeed
No. Hell no.
Edit: I might stick around and use it as a reason to frick around with some other girls but I won't be staying that long..
Edit: I might stick around and use it as a reason to frick around with some other girls but I won't be staying that long..
This post was edited on 2/15/14 at 8:59 pm
Posted on 2/15/14 at 9:09 pm to NorthTiger
quote:
NorthTiger
There are a lot of people in this thread saying a lot of things that they would do. Most of these comments are probably made with the luxury of not having kids involved. When you throw them into the mix it changes things. In that circumstance I might stay but our relationship would never be the same again. I think then the decisions about whether the relationship continued would shift into her court. I can imagine that feelings toward her would cool quite a bit. Probably not have nearly the passion that was there before and certainly not confide in nor share things that were just normal stuff before.
Posted on 2/15/14 at 9:49 pm to Ghostfacedistiller
quote:
I don't get the qualifier. Seems line the ridiculously large sex organ would be salt in the wound. Is it supposed to mitigate the circumstance? Is anyone saying "well I was going to end it, but since it was a huge cock I guess it's cool"
It complicates an already tough situation. In the original caller's case, he had forgiven the wife's infidelity but was unable to get over the idea of his wife with such a well-endowed male.
Posted on 2/15/14 at 9:50 pm to bencoleman
quote:
bencoleman
In my case there were young children involved. The other issue is that I found about 5 years after the fact........after a period of time that we had worked on and resolved many issues. Still, this one came as a shock to me.
it's very easy to sit on the sidelines and say what you would do if you've never been through an event like this. Ever felt every tough emotion known to man (mad, vengeful, unforgiving). Every person has to decide for themselves what you would do in this situation. In some cases the revelation of an affair comes at the lowest point of a marrigage. That wasn't the case for me.
In the 25 years since the disclosure we have had another child, been through the deaths of our parents, laughed a whole lot, shared a whole lot, experinced passion and supported each other in many ways. She was not a healthy person when all of this happened.
Trust is earned over a long period of time. Trust is no longer an issue for me and this seems like it happened to two other people right now......except for those couple of times a year when my let this get to me. Maybe i'm not as forgiving as I think I am.
Posted on 2/16/14 at 6:33 am to shutterspeed
Hell no. I would probably have some serious insecurities and end up moving somewhere in asia where i'd have the biggest 4 inches on the continent.
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