re: I’m headed to rehab tomorrow. ((Updated OP))

During your stay, hopefully they will go in deep detail about what is occurring in your body that makes this so tough.

My ex was admitted into intensive in patient 3 times and not until we went to La Hacienda did I personally learn about the science in excruciating depth. The disease or condition - whatever anyone chooses to call it - is undeniably at the gene and chemical makeup level in the brain for some. If nothing else I had an understanding of why she didn't have that "will power" ability "normal" people may have when alcohol is present in the system. Or how to stop the next day. It was an amazingly intense study by staff scientists and doctors. Blown away. All that to say I understand what you struggle with and the chemistry behind it. I bet dozens here know what you are going through.

So, LEARN about the condition. The science. Why you can't slip even a little. Listen, learn and think about it way past just depression, the high or whatever.

Obviously, as an Ex she still struggles. I'm hoping you have better success and we hope for an update in a month or 3.